Soccer for Jo

This  is just what might of been put in as part of my official childhood.

The idea of soccer for girls rather like cricket  was just laughed out of court by most Games mistresses way back then, not that I didn't like the staples of netball, hockey and rounders far from it but it would of been good to of had the choice.

Do You Believe Everyone Is Beautiful?

 

Do you believe everyone is beautiful? I sure do!
Yes this is a good question I saw on a social network the other day and I think it's worth a wee bit of talk about.
What do you think beauty is?
Well if we went by what we see in the fashion magazines women's pages in the newspapers and that we might think it was just about looks - what you wear and how your body looks so some people think you can buy it.
Some spend millions of dollars on fashion and almost as much on cosmetic surgery to match some image that may of been deliberately altered but If I was your fairy godmother and grant you this, do you think this would make you any the more happier?
I suspect not cos whilst it makes sense to dress yourself in ways that make the most of your figure - and we've all different figures, right - what matters in inner beauty.
Yes, all that stuff that's in you and to which there is no makeover you can buy at the Mac counter for it.
That's not to say if you're experience problems that seeking a good counsellor may not be a bad thing or maybe joining a self help group isn't a bad idea of you can't hit it off with people or you have low self esteem perhaps but it's what you offer as a person that counts really.
And you can argue as much as you like but actually somewhere in you there is a beautiful person and the World wants to met them. And yes I believe Everyone is beautiful deep down.

Repairs

It's been a difficult few weeks following the incident, so I've had a bit of time off from my voluntary role while I get my head together and make the necessary adjustments to my membership of various sites, blogs I've contributed to and obviously this one, my own, to prevent such a mishap ever happening again.
The thing is it only happened cos these people had ages to research links, test email addresses to other places and so on as most people would just try for a minute and give up.
I've decided never to publish an email account address on blog again ever to avoid that one happening and continue drinking my milk with cookies as regressed as I love to be.
There are as I'm sure some websites who have a variation on this schoolgirl look I talk about and the associated sides to that role I am in that either isn't authentic, being more part naked attempting to wear uniforms or just schoolgirls dressed more for adult titilation but my site and my posts at sites were never like that.

This is an example of non authentic attire sold as Uniform by 'adult' suppliers and the first thing to say is those thigh high socks exposed would never be permitted in any school never mind the very skimpy nature of the skirt part of her Gymslip and the too shiny material.
What I'm about is the emotionally real authentic school uniform wearing middle enjoying being treated like a child and nothing else.

Wardrobe of the mind

This is an image of the mind wardrobe of myself around the age of eight with all the colours and the dress I liked which lead to the first real dressing during school vacations and whatever spare time I could find.

Now by the time I was in my teens this was how I wanted to look  in my school uniform around the age of eleven through thirteen being gangly and if I'd of put that skirt on doubt would of which is a core image of the child me

Today I do although nothing really has changed because what happened through that childhood that included those images of how I'd of been throughout that period, this is how I actually am dressed as that age regressed adult-child little.
Whatever the chronological age of me might be, the age I am inside that governs how I think, act and relate so I'm still a middle school/junior high girl functionally and so in certain settings were uniform.

Taking stock

 

The events of the last six weeks remind me about some of experiences I had not just when I was younger but even as (on paper at least) an adult and as painful as that is I'm gonna talk a bit about that.

To be disabled, that's to say you have conditions that compared to many leave you at at such a less of function your abilities are significantly impaired that they are classed as 'disabilities' that they prevent or make very difficult is bad enough.

What often makes life harder for you is both how it is people simply won't do anything that may even be a relatively easy things to do that would help because  they have this belief that unless you can be just like them you shouldn't be with them as equals which with a few changes can easily be made so.

Some prefer to make up for this by treating you as an object of sympathy, wheeling you out of their space with sweetened tea, biscuits and a pat on the head.

 Others start to act mean, deliberately tripping you up, I had one boy at school who tried to wreak the classroom and blame me cos I couldn't speak very well and if it wasn't for the intervention of one girl who had more guts and morality to speak in my defence to the headteacher, I'd of been facing a caning with a request for my folks to discuss my future at the school too which had I actually of done this would of been deserved but I didn't.

I was assaulted twice by the a couple of the year group beneath me at Junior school once in the playground and once on the route back home for being 'spastic' which as someone with Cerebal Palsy I can't help. I've also been spat at on buses by older boys.

I've been called names by random persons since leaving school, yelling 'Mong', 'Muppet' and the like either as passing on the sidewalk or in through their car windows.

Thing is, as unpleasant and unjustified as each and every one of these are I'm not giving up on being me because my disabilities, the spasticity, the learning and developmental disabilities that have a big impact on my life are me. I own them and I'm not gonna hide from people who wish to exploit or hurt me because  of that.

Fruits Basket

This four DVD set comprises of the first 8 volumes of the Fruits Basket manga in anime form and is packaged in a pop up style box containing the individual DVD's.

This is about the Sohma family who are cursed. However, this is not an ordinary family curse. When a member of the family is embraced by a person of the opposite gender, they transform into an animal of the Chinese Zodiac. The Sohmas' managed to keep the curse private for generations, but when a young girl stumbles upon their secret, life at the Sohma house changes forever. Conflict erupts as Zodiac rivals clash in the most unusual household. Young Tohru Honda must promise the secret will remain her own, or face the consequences!

Disc1: A great transformation? Episodes 1-6

Try imagining if you moved in with a new family and friends... and found out they turn into animals when you hug them.

The first three episodes of the Anime version are take up with the four main characters of the story and an explanation the nature of the Zodiac curse the family are under. The action as it slowly unfolds is genuinely charming - slapstick fighting, side splitting tongue in check dialogue ad romantic comedy.

As the story opens, Tohru Honda is living in the woods in a cheap tent, with only her late mother's photo for company. One day she wanders down to a large house nearby, and encounters the flirtatious Shigure Sohma, and his gorgeous cousin Yuki -- the school's mysterious "Prince." After Tohru becomes ill and her tent is destroyed, Yuki and Shigure take her into their home as their new housekeeper.

But Yuki and Shigure are keeping a secret from her. When martial-artist Kyo bursts in to fight Yuki, Tohru tries to stop him -- and the three men end up turning into a dog, a cat, and a rat. Their family is cursed with the thirteen spirits of the Chinese zodiac, and they turn into those animals whenever a member of the opposite sex hugs them.

Surprisingly, the mysterious family head Akito allows Tohru to stay with Yuki and Shigure, as long as the volatile Kyo also stays. And soon she starts encountering new problems -- the intermittently crazed Kagura (the boar) invades the house, Yuki and Kyo trash the house, and Tohru's pals Hana and Uo come for a sleepover. But when Tohru's grandfather calls her back to his house, will the Sohmas lose their new friend?

Tohru herself is the most lovable character of the bunch -- she has a lot of sorrow over her mother's death and the unkindness of some of her relatives, but she compensates with optimism and friendliness. And the Sohmas rule as far as quirkiness is concerned -- there's the shy, strong "Prince" Yuki, the volatile loner Kyo, and the charmingly kooky Shigure ("Sometimes it feels like the whole world is conspiring to destroy my house!").

This first volume may start a little slow however once the storyline gets underway the quirky sweet-natured comody of lovable characters is revealed in its glory.

Disc2: What Becomes of Snow? Episodes 7-12

Having introduced use the the four main characters the following episodes reveal a darker side mainly from Hatori's tragic past, and the revelation of just what a lonely, painful life many of the zodiac members lead. Even the younger ones like Haru aren't immune, since we see that he was often mocked for his animal's part in the old zodiac folktaleide .

"Fruits Basket, Volume 2: What Becomes of Snow?" introduces us to three new members of the Sohma family, as well as a look at how the mysterious Akito rules over them. But despite these darker moments, the series never strays too far from the warm-hearted comedy and appealing characters.

Our leads are all involved in the school's Cultural Festival, despite Yuki's distress at having to wear a dress. But then two new Sohmas show up: bubbly rabbit Momiji, and the chilly Hatori, who tells Tohru to meet him at the Sohma main house -- alone. Despite Tohru's nervousness, she obeys -- and finds out the painful facts about Hatori's past, and the isolation felt by cursed Sohmas.

When New Year's rolls around, Tohru and her friends help Kyo and Yuki clean the house, while Shigure torments his hysterical editor Mii. They're expected back at the main Sohma house, but the boys are reluctant to leave Tohru alone. And a school endurance run is interrupted by Haru Sohma, who is determined to fight Kyo -- but their battle is interrupted when Yuki collapses.

Then Valentine's Day comes around. Tohru has chocolate for everyone (literally), Yuki is stalked by his fangirls, and Kagura is busily trying to feed Kyo a chocolate heart the size of his head. And a month later, Momiji repays Tohru's favour by giving her an extravagant gift -- a trip to a hot spring.

We also get to see some different sides of Tohru and her friends -- for instance, it's revealed that despite her outward cheery demeanour, Tohru is at times very lonely for her mother. Yuki continues trying to come out of his shell, while Kyo gingerly tries to overcome his social awkwardness. The "plum on the back" scene ends up being adorable because of this.

We are introduced to meet some new Sohmas, particularly Haru and Hatori. Haru has a dual personality -- one placid and serene, one violent and lecherous -- and a tumultuous past with Yuki while Hatori comes across as the most tragic figure thus far, convinced that he is doomed to loneliness, and haunted by what happened when he dared to love someone.

Disc3: Puddles Of Memories Episodes 13-19

Following the ending of disc 2 with the revelation that Hatsuharu and Momiji would soon be attending high school with the others, it's not surprising that the high school hijinks ensue once these weird teenagers join the student body. And though there's plenty of goofiness from Yuki's fangirls and his long-estranged brother in "Fruits Basket Vol. 3 - Puddles of Memories," it has some very bittersweet themes in many of the episodes. For a series with such a sparkly happy heroine, it's remarkably dark.

The first day of school gets off to a rocky start, with Momiji dressing like a girl and Haru getting into a "black" bustup with the pompous class president. But then the news arrives that Akito is about to visit the school -- and Tohru bumps into the mysterious head of the Sohma family. Although he's pleasant and warm toward her, she catches a glimpse of the true, malevolent personality behind the mask.

If that wasn't enough more members of the zodiac pop out of the woodwork -- a snake slithers up Tohru's dress, and is revealed to be the flamboyant, eccentric Ayame Sohma, Yuki's estranged big brother, who is now trying to make amends for his past behaviour. And then Haru introduces Tohru to a very bitey little tiger cub, Kisa Sohma. Kisa has been ignored and tormented by her peers until she stopped talking, and now only Tohru's love and Yuki's understanding can draw her out of her shell.

Elsewhere we learn Tohru contracts the flu right before a big test, Shigure sweeps his friends off to a weekend at a lake house, the gang visits the grave of Tohru's mother, and Tohru learns of the cheerful Momiji's tragic past. Plus in one hilarious episode, Yuki's fangirls scheme to infiltrate Hanajima's house so they can take out the "witch" Tohru but not to worry Hana and her little brother have some surprises in store...

"Fruits Basket" has always been a series that is rather bright and sunny in its overall outlook, but the short-term stories always have some darker, sadder dimensions. In particular, the third volume delves into Yuki's past abuse at Akito's hands, a parent who abandoned their cursed child, and some closure to Hatori's story of his tragic lost love. And there are hints of a dark connection between Tohru's late mother and Kyo.

The writers successfully transport Natsuki Takaya's bittersweet scenes into anime, such as an adorable scene where Tohru hugs Momiji after he proclaims that he wants to believe that every memory is important, even the painful ones. Even Ayame -- crazy, flamboyant, and utterly self-absorbed -- gets a few poignant moments as he reflects on his own past selfishness.

These episodes also introduce us to the most priceless character in all of "Fruits Basket" -- Ayame the crazy, flamboyant, self-absorbed, lecherous, hyperdramatic seamster. Not only is it completely surreal whenever he's onscreen ("They may direct their desire towards ME!"), but he has his own brand of poignancy -- he tries so hard to connect with Yuki, but fails so hilariously. Kisa sure is a little sweetie, but she's understandably overshadowed by her older cousin.

Yuki and Kyo also experience some growth in personal character in these episodes.

For instance we see Yuki freezing when confronted by his former tormentor, and struggles just to be in the same room as his brother and yet we also see him trying to be stronger despite his flaws. Kyo's klutzy attempts to help Tohru - including making the hated leek soup - show his growing feelings. Also Momiji, a character even sunnier than Tohru, is revealed to have a past even more horrible than hers.

Disc4: The clearing Sky Episodes 20-26
At this the dead end of the anime series more zodiac members are introduced to Tohru and more madcap comedy ensues (courtesy of Ayame and the demented fanclub), but it reaches new heights in the final two episodes -- where Tohru's love and kindness are faced with new obstacles.

Yuki and Tohru make a weekend trip to Ayame's special clothing shop, and are promptly swept up into Hurricane Ayame, who is all too happy to regale Yuki with every detail of his oddball business. Can the brothers manage to bridge the gap that separates them -- and what exactly is "The Thing" that Ayame's girlfriend is dressing Tohru in?

Plus Tohru is confronted by a pair of new zodiac members. First she encounters Hiro, the antisocial "sheep" who resents her friendship with Kisa and then she meets the beautiful, hyperapologetic daughter of the hot spring lady, Ritsu... only to discover that Ritsu is actually a very effeminate young man, who suffers from self-esteem so low that it dips below Atlantis.

As Ritsu drives Kyo and Yuki crazy with his screaming apologies (and is teased constantly by Shigure), it's up to Tohru to help him regain some hope. Finally, the president of Yuki's fanclub is haunted by her impending graduation, only to find herself in conversation with the "prince" himself. Unfortunately, her jealousy wells up in front of him -- and she has to face the ugly truth about her own feelings.

It isn't long before the story takes a truly dark turn when Kyo's beloved master Kazuma arrives at Shigure's house, and reveals a horrifying facet of Kyo's curse -- a ghastly transformation that horrifies anyone who sees it. And as she struggles to help Kyo, Tohru begins to learn the reason for Akito's anger and hatred.

"Fruits Basket, Volume 4: The Clearing Sky" doesn't so much end the series as hit pause -- the curse remains unbroken and the love triangle is still unresolved. As a sort of series climax, the writers even scripted in a harrowing encounter between Tohru and Akito, which gives the series the vague feeling of having been finished.

Before that end, we get "Fruits Basket's" signature mingling of heartwarming comedy and bittersweet drama. There are plenty of roiling emotions -- jealousy, loneliness, self-loathing -- but with the realization that there's always a glimmer of hope. The wrenching emotions reach a climax in the final two episodes, when the reasons for Kyo's loneliness are revealed, as well as Kagura's mad crush on him. Horror, romance and drama just soak every scene but the humour remais as infectious as ever.

Tohru continues to be a shining beacon at the series' heart -- she's sweet, kind, accepting, and cannot help but try to be kind to anyone, even when Hiro steals her purse and insults her. On the flipside, Kyo's feelings of loneliness and misery are absolutely palpable near the end -- and considering what he turns into, it's not hard to see why.

Actually, all the characters we see are pretty lovable -- Yuki is quiet, cool and a lot tougher than he appears, while Ayame and his girlfriend are insane and quirky, Kisa and Ritsu are adorable, and Shigure is winningly sadistic. Even the deranged hot springs lady appears ("I'm SORRY! I'll do it again! I never should have put myself into the reel! What was I thinking?! I'm SORRY!" "I told him we shouldn't have asked her to come...").
It is in some respects unfortunate that the storyline was not completed in this beautiful, hilarious "Fruits Basket" anime series but that doesn't stop it from being a truly, wrenchingly beautiful end to an adorable series.

The fourth and final volume of the sadly wasn't able to finish the storyline -- but it's still a brilliant finale to a moving anime adaptation.

Spring fashion

For as long as I can remember I've always been fascinated by socks, plain ones such as black grey or white school ones, colourful ankle socks which I did have when I was younger cos my folks at least would be me them and also patterned longer socks.


They are so much young kittenish Jo.