Thoughts on being away

As you may of noticed I was actually away last week and on the other blog  I did publish an account of that time in something like chronological order which is more the how and the what part of this thing.
It's usually the thing on this blog to look more at what I felt about that time and what if anything I had learnt from that time away cos apart from ouchie content, this blog is about the emotional side of life.

 One thing to talk about is unlearning the Cotton Wool  people misguidedly put you in as a disabled child because they feel you need more protection but the trouble is that leaves you not to learn how to survive and to actually grow which requires a certain amount of resistance not unlike in working out you start off low increasing as you become stronger.

You do need risk and being challenged even accepting your limitations so you learn to work at the almost extent of your abilities, getting the most out of life and actually maturing a little, learning to deal with say climbing over rock, walking carefully sideways to get along ledges is something I had to learn rather than run away from this week.

Same goes with dealing with winds even if needed support, I had to learn to accept and trust that rather than chickening out or screaming my head off when the going got tough, finding courage and inner strength.

I've been there and done that and I dare say I'm not alone in it but I need to be better because such an set of attitudes limits my own enjoyment of life with the actual disabilities I've got so I need to use and develop my abilities too.

I know I made one miscalculation in that week but I lived going out of my comfort zone and did stuff I never managed before which didn't just feel good to me but also impressed others not by droning on about my disabilities but actually using the abilities I have.

Ditto helping out whenever I could doing chores to make a contribution to other peoples enjoyment and getting the feeling of being a net contributor to everyone's enjoyment of our time together rather than just using people to meet my own needs.

I think I'm moving on.

n

Caning and Middle Me

When a fair while back this whole notion of Caregiving and the use of spanking was envisaged the use of anything else outside of spanking implements such as the Paddle wasn’t really thought of although Caning and the threat of was a part of childhood in a school setting.

Something else discussed was putting ribbons in my hair to make me feel more Junior, which I think as in the picture below would be good for me.

With the involvement of other trusted Adults who are disciplinarians to me of necessity conversations were started around their ideas, what they themselves felt comfortable in delivering never mind what I did, so a broader range of corporal punishment came  in and Caning was one.

With me the Cane is reserved for the most serious infractions where aim is less deterrence but more of extinguishing a behavioural tract by use if an more stronger soaring pain than even a Paddle.

If you haven’t been caned don’t confuse her composure for really what she is feeling is a feeling that forever will be linked to her memory of the infraction which is the entire point.

This WILL happen to my bottom from now on.

 Although its use is very sparing I’m happy, nay glad when I need it, those who care for me will use it to help me behave.

The pain really helps.

Why my knickers are always down

Some folks argue about the effectiveness of it but often miss the point.
A thin pair of knickers doesn’t provide much protection to your bottom in all honesty, modesty maybe but hey is that what you need?

 It’s two-fold, the first being bring in you a sense of shame in having to be disciplined and allied to that is that you were no longer in control of the situation. Those things really motivate a girl to avoid getting into a spanking by being responsible and thinking about what she’s doing. Shame is quite effective, trust me and why good Caregivers and disciplinarians  take the trouble to give you that emotion.

The second is if like me you are disciplined with leather or wooden implements too, they help your disciplinarian to see you’re getting a good red bottom while looking out for any cuts or heavy bruising.
That’s why I always have my knickers taken down by those in my life who can and do spank me when I need it. It may be my birthday soon but I'm still young enough to be spanked.

Sanriotown issues and more

 It was with some shock to find on Friday last an activity that had been a part of my internet life for a long time just wasn't available outside of the other business talked about elsewhere and still isn't available as I type this.

For almost as long as this blog has been going, Sanriotown.com was the first port of call not just for The Game but also things such as the busy forum where by design discussions were never 18+ which suited me as most adult conversations go over my head and don't really fit in my life, offered wallpaper and screen-savers.

They also has something I just adored, a oh so kawaii email with customization of the domains for whatever sanriotown character you liked  which for me meant I had a me @hellokitty.com email address that linked directly to things such as ecards you could people at Easter, Thanksgiving and Christmas and that

When I went to look at it, my email had gone with over a decades worth of stored emails from past organizations and acquaintances 

The overall impression is that sanriotown.com and Hello Kitty Online is for all intents and purposes dead joining other sites we used such as experience project, friends reunited, beststuff and the GeoCities blogging platform in the internet graveyard. 

Something else I wish to get off my chest is I have no interest in sissification and all it's female dominate misandry driven tropes having had more than enough people on tumblr and on other no longer with us sites try to bracket me in with all that stuff.

I'm into age regression, being an adult but acting from a age regressed little/middle girl mindset where everything is from my own childhood era what it was and seen as suitable for an actual child not some kink based game.

I like boys as in adult males who are age regressed to be just that, with gumption, purpose and to act and dress like one not in ridiculously exposing super fussy dresses that no girl would be seen dead in while being treated in grossly humiliating fashion by bossy women.
I feel it's wrong to 'make' boys like that and a insulting parody of real femininity.