Going back down to the start

 It's been a week of decisions of sorts  most of which ties into things we have talked about on here before one being this pandemic.

It is hard to believe we were only about two months ago pushing for getting people back into offices and allowing this years 18 year olds start their university degree courses mainly on campus and yet this week much of this is upside down.

It seems to me as if we're playing a big game of snakes and ladders as allow both of things seems to have upped infection rates to the point we're going back down the ladder to quite severe restrictions in some instances.

Liverpool and surrounding areas are set to be on lockdown in all but name just as we were at the beginning where I am on the High medium level tier unable to have anyone come see me at home, supposed to avoid peak time travel and unable to sit at a table in restaurant with a family member.

Actually there is very little covid here at all because by a quirk of political map drawing we are drawn in on a map that has the top part next to a area that has a high infection rate next to a major city while ignoring the fact this is part of another city's travel to work area where it is very low where we shop, work and socialize.

This means that even if the Halloween Party and Bonfire had gone ahead which the organizer of had announced had been cancelled, I could not of stayed indoors there.

Their county is exempt from any special measures unlike mine even though two out of three districts neighbouring it are on the same middle High tier as I am which goes to show the flaw in this approach - they are not going by where people live, work, shop and socialize only the political units that have different reasons for being lumped together usually based on petty political battles between individual towns.

Thus I can rule out having any family members come see me at Christmas and seeing my friends this side of 2021 and even then some are saying this will last until June of that year.

I think we'd of all gone stark staring bonkers with massive amounts of anxiety and mental health issues by then not least from people facing losing jobs and homes.

Covid is serious but not the only major issue we're facing.

 

Guides for Jo?

There are times when I tend to think about the "what ifs" as much as I hold with not having regrets about how life has turned out over the years.

Within this life there is the eternal schoolgirl, the one as this blog puts it is in "Jo's Dorm" but as a chance overheard conversion with some schoolboys earlier on in this lockdown remarked as they went they had more in that label.

For me the act of presenting as the forever schoolgirl Jo has involved a lot of things such as wearing school uniform, doing some actual studying and being subject to the kind of school discipline of my era.

I do feel though that as they boys said about themselves there's more in those identities like the interests you have and it's not of you are always a child - some use the term Age Dysphoria" to describe it  - the case it's all school.

I think something like a form of Girl Guides experience given obviously it could never be with their official organisation with the activities, oversight and uniform with in a week would be something I would look forward to, working to similar goals.

With me it's never been about just the academic, just being an autistic girl means you find social interaction awkward and the associated things make following instructions difficult so a mixture of outdoor stuff, practical activities and some life skills  based around past programs.

Given the Brown Owl of my era could smack then there's no reason for me while with someone who was being her not to use it the odd time rather as a few are wont to do just to use things like school or guides as theme for spanking role play in ways they just were not in that era.

Things the muggles don't say about Covid

 

Covid has made many things different such as meeting up with other littles with the event for early November more or less off although I suspect the person who is organizing it doesn't wish for that that so much they haven't formally said it.

There are others who haven't been able to get to things such as schools for adult littles to go back in time, learn and play with the structures they were brought up in and others who find the anxiety around it with perpetual changes in rules and routines so difficult to cope with that you are wound up, prone to lashing out they feel the need for adults to spank them as it's the only way to keep control.

But of course the rules around Covid have meant many of us haven't been able to go to the adults we normally would who'd do this for us not least here with swaths of the country subject to no person outside your household being allowed indoor contact with another.

I could really use a good firm bare bottom spanking right now.. 

Round up

 

Bit of a round up this week.

Feeling better for the anti biotics even if it messed my tummy up somewhat is what I'm working on stabilizing it.

One reason I like to use chat services when I am well is for the opportunity to have play in a virtual playground where we can internet versions of 'tag', engage in very much regressed child-like conversations of the sort that would be easy to do when physically together.

I love to go to LG Camp but sadly covid caused this July's to be cancelled, we have bookings for next year but we don't really know how that's going to play out given the current guidance and it's very possible the Halloween/Guy Fawkes Night meeting may well be off due to same restrictions.

Thus having a spot where you can do that virtual online would be ideal but sadly one person decided to let off a very political rant around the government which really took me out of that child-like mindset that just want to play games, crack playground jokes and just let my inner twelve year child out just playing the way we did.

And that's the thing, we have spaces for groan up talk and we'd never even as grown up bring up politics at a garden party as it's just not the right place and as junior or early years high school children playing out we'd never even consider it as while we know what's on the news that's not our world.

We just play with each other without any consider of who our parents supported or repeating their views and that was what I wanted and could not get in for littles last night.

Are you paying attention?

 t remains a weird old world beyond this blog and we've been going really quite a long time, longer than perhaps you think.

It's origins run in a outwardly gender discussion blog I established in the earliest days of "Treacle" the original Stone tower pc running all my internet needs and finding Blogger, the Google blogging platform as a place for talking about gender issues and being a sissy when the original blog was centred on music, photography, travel posts and the arts ignoring all of that.

Thus I work though my at times conflicted thoughts around gender identity here trying to keep things free from stuff I'd seen get other blogs shut down apart from talking around my emotion regulation issues and spanking. 

This blog like the other is showing signs of being affected by events simply because a part of this life that I normally write about is on indefinite hold cos you can't meet up with anyone who isn't a part of your own household as as I need round the clock care I need to live with someone who provides that as much as the other chunk comes in though other people in my life on the littles/cp side.

That whole approach to it from the way you are physically as well as psychologically handled  when I cross lines comes in from them and when with the amount of mental stress around currently you do get to the point of lashing out say, I do miss being put back forcible in my place as a adult child.

I suspect when eventually this emergency is all over a good number of us will need some help coping the changed world but at least I can dress as sissy as I like with few people needing to see it on the street.

August bank holiday weekend edition

This weekend over here is what is August Bank Holiday, traditionally the week  before you returned to school where people may spend a day or so at the seaside or be on a late summer vacation taking in fresh air and sun.

So hardly any surprise  my thoughts are elsewhere as type today's post, the second but last of the month where I talked about being away, and what I and this blog is about  taking in the odd interest.
I have been enjoying Sunday's Storytime hosted by a long term friend where stories are read aloud from books and E-books with the images shared in a audio-visual stream as children's literature especially Girls Own plays a part within my regression and so I do talk about it like last week on this blog
 
There have been continuing developments on and around Tumblr that I do wish to address of which the first is my number of followers has increased which was hardly solicited and is considerably  more than the period around the end of last year that saw a some folks go.
 

While I take no satisfaction from it, I think the fact I have been able not only to equal but exceed what it was at that point shows the way in which both I age regress and am respectful of other peoples limits within theirs has a respect that transcends labels and what certain communities would have you believe.

It is less about the label, it's really more about your own standards and respect for the boundaries  of other individuals who share in age regression although I am grateful for the opportunity given by my community for the opportunity to make a fresh start based on principles that both match and also respect mine.

Another thing I will mention is I do intend to reduce the blog cycle down from weekly as in the last few months I have been unwell for several days at a time and I need all the time I can get to recover from severe migraines that leave me messed up mentally for a few days afterward.
 

More G.O.* fiction

I've not been too brilliant this week with one thing or another, not the sort of thing that benefit from "localized heating" not that mind that when it's needed but more bigger things being unwell so between things have been doing a spot of reading as it helps keep my spirits up.

With the Secret Seven's stories I had changed from a mixture of newer copies and old paperbacks to being in hard back editions with original texts over the years as the alterations made no sense.

This lesser known author wrote Jill At Hazelmere in nineteen sixty-four and Jill Investigates both borrowing from the Girl comic strip series Wendy and Jinx school based adventures where both are Forth Formers.

It's the very sort of book I love and actually it's the first time I've owned a copy - mine's from nineteen sixty-six  although I'm sure saw a copy at boarding school in the Seventies.

Sadly the Girls Comic site which had extracts from many British girls comics including Girl that was published between nineteen fifty-one and nineteen sixty-four has disappeared as has the middlescommonroom.com site where mainly older  junior fiction was discussed.

Trying to find a G.O* or mainly G.O discussion board where such staples of the junior fiction I read back then is proving difficult.

*G.O = Girls Only, the very girl centric type of novel or comic writing usually about schools, horses and princesses.