Lessons learned

Being dressed as a schoolgirl is so fitting for me cos it makes me feel small and helps people treat me more as that girl in so many ways which was the thing I learned while away last week as it felt good even for just a short period.
It showed what I had been thinking for a good while now really is true, a return to being a child being with child like routines and rules is what I need.

Chill out zone

 

I'm feeling a bit more relaxed although I'm away regressing this week looking just like the school girl I feel in an environment that's very much in little space enjoying every second of it.

The last time I messed up, putting my oar in to a situation that had nothing to do with me just cause I could ending up with a verbal chastisement for it that can't really complain about as sometimes I just overshoot even though my intention was just to suggest something that might of worked better.

Outside of the activities, I just found being in the gardens, walking around helped to keep me calm as I sorry about social situations cos I just seem to put my feet in it, spotting the wildlife.

Test run

This next week I'm off on an experiment to see how this idea I've been talking about off and on feels like and runs in reality with other middles and littles.

New additions

Hey, hey folks this week I'm talking about a couple  of friends who've recently come into my life after requiring a new home.
First up is Millie who as you can see is a  magnificent 8 inch 'vintage' rag doll in her sailor uniform including woollen bloomers in pretty good shape.

In addition to her and I did promise Colleen I would, here is her rehomed friend, Amy

Okay for girls of certain chronological age  this means something because she is one of the Holly Hobbie characters popularized in the works of Denise Holly Ulinskas, an American children's story writer.
The cat-loving, rag dress-wearing little girl in a giant bonnet and licensed to Knickerbocker Toys who popularized these rag dolls in the mid 1970's. 
Amy is an original  and had to be resowed carefully during her previous life but otherwise is in good rather than exceptional shape.
Be that as it may, these were the dolls my female friends played with outside of Sindy and Barbie and I always wanted one badly and now I have Amy.

Important Note:  The next blog update will be delayed as I shall be elsewhere shall we say but I will publish an entry as soon as I can.

Carefree pasts

Sometimes I just feel like sitting down and writing things like short stories and reading although I struggle with both having done so since childhood but that whole carefree feel doing something is what I think I need.

Revitalized girl

Ha! that got you thinking, eh?

Well between the rain dampening my bones and the return of the gale force winds thoughts went back to creature comforts.

Part of the treatment for girls like me includes wearing shorter skirts outside of schooling as they do take away most the elements of appearing grown up, do look quite and can aid disciplining.

Well kinda connected I guess is this

Okay they're flat ballet pump styled but let's be honest here with the effects of my cerebral palsy on walking as fanciful as heels might be, the one big problem I have is being able to walk maintaining my balance and I wobble badly in heels (maybe I need crutches?) so practicality wins out.

One the other hand they are feminine, do possess a bow and are sufficiently school like to wear with my uniform.

Waiting or making things happen

It may be just over four weeks off but my thoughts are very much centred around that time not least ideally you'd review the last year and most of us were encouraged to keep a journal of what we did, where went, what we learned and critically what we felt which would of helped with understanding how I felt about me and my life and perhaps of aided some sort of maturity which I'll be honest, I know I lack.

Something I think I do think might of helped me grow up at least a bit more which I do really need to would of been to had spent rather more of actual childhood in Girl Guiding, learning new skills, developing more confidence, learning to be a "do-er", being very much one of the girls.

Being able to show what I could learn, having a place in the scheme of things, learning to give more of myself rather than expecting others to do it really was the thing and perhaps it is time to consider something along those lines to help me grow up.