Birthday reflections

This day is quite an important one for me that I'll blog the other bits of separately but for me this is the start of another fifty-two weeks in my life and the end of the last period of fifty-two weeks although like many littles and middles I never really leave the sense of being the age in this headspace I am. I never really feel older cos I hit my developmental limits a very long time ago.
It's a messy thing cos of the mess that is my family whose many degrees in messiness often took much of the magic of having a day of your own away never mind the petty-mindedness of the arguments they'd pick  on and around of that day.
Mom always say I’m the one that can be counted on to think more about what needs to happen, what would make a difference for the better and at least try to work with it.
Much happened in that twelve months some of which I have written about here and elsewhere but it's been the biggest period where I had real guidance in my life talking through both my longer term problems with plans and shorter more immediate needs.
It's also been the period where the rules and structures in my life have changed dramatically as there has been a very real rolling back of my post legal childhood authority  and status to approximate tween/early teen level.
Part of that is from the recognition that while it is fine for me to have an input and a say in things, because I do mess up in ways I don't necessarily learn from because my ability to do so is limited allowing me the final say just wasn't working. Someone who is more responsible needs to.
The other part is that in order see to it the rules and structures I agreed to are being kept they need to have the authority to impose them and discipline me for breaches so I learn to follow them and that's that in outline that's much such a big difference to my life this last twelve months.
So on this day I wish to thank those people in my life who have provided that guidance be they friends who stepped in saying what needed to said to help me or those who are more directly involved working through issues,for each and every reprimand and spanking you gave me when I needed it.
You did right by me helping me become more responsible over our last twelve months and here's to the next twelve where you'll help me further cos I know you all care about me and that's why all this happens.