Laziness

 

Today as I write this ready for publication I am taking advantage of LilJennies being away meaning Sunday's Furry Story time isn't happening this week to get on with some work.
One thing I think is worth talking over again is what we call Laziness as it effects us and the people we live and work replete with the struggles  in overcoming it.

It's a good idea to know what it is we are talking about here and the OED definition is "the quality of being unwilling to work or use energy; idleness" which suggests this isn't a physiological thing such that arise from low self-esteem or depression but more an attitude to avoid or do the least work possible.

I think it's important both as the person who is exhibiting the behaviour and also for the one who is helping you with it to know the difference between "can't" and won't".

Some start points for a won't is the belief that it is someone elses responsibility  to undertake a task such as organize an event we wish to participate in or having notice that say a person has left some litter that we shug our shoulders as if to say "I don't do it, why should I clean this up?" when we are capable of doing it and keeping the area tidy is everybody's responsibility.

For some this began and ended by end of childhood and yet we see it go on around us. Still others of us have to truthfully say we are a part of this because we tend to be lazy perhaps because nobody would dare call us out over it.

I know when I was having major issues around this and procrastination things go to the point that I had a mentor who was able to see revisiting this more from the angle of a childhood hang over  and we agreed to resort to spanking without exception me because anything that worked on verbal reasoning got fogged over and totally misunderstood.

It took several goes to get this burned into my critical faculties - that there were painful consequences  before I started to offer or act first  as a matter of course which has lead the odd lapse aside to considerable improvements in my attitudes and behaviours so for me spanking did help with it.

An area that is associated with is feeling tired that may not be laziness per se but coming more from feeling tired and so not included to want to help because we did not manage our own health issues by taking medication, getting in necessary sleep and maintaining general well being.

I know I've had issues with cutting out sleep for cyber life at night before now so I just lacked energy to do what I needed to do for me and any agreed chores and apart from scoldings I have had lines and spankings for.

Unless you've gone through this, you have no idea how you mess up your own life often for the least important things just for a obsession of that moment you couldn't leave alone.
That's why I think it's well worth revisiting this topic today.

Thanksgiving

After last weeks post, for some of you there was an important event you marked Tuesday November 22nd that is marked regardless of what else may be going on in your country.

I think actually here in the UK we're kind of remiss on not having a day of thanksgiving simply because for us as a people, society and nation-state we do have reason to be thankful for what is done for us be it by friends, your family or those in public employ who educate, look after and protect us.
Through them all we are helped on way throughout each year dealing with challenges in our lives such as lack and for some of us, ill health and disabilities that go beyond what people have to do.
Let us be thankful for all those who make our lives that much the better.

Role playing?

There are times when I do feel like I'm banging my head against a brick wall  of one one them is when it is people insist this thing I write about is just a role play that I elect to play some of the time.
Now it isn't that there's anything wrong of itself with role playing someone who is younger although people do argue about how far and in what context it should be if that is what you feel (and clearly there is a need as it is being met commercially).
No, it's that for some of us it is more going back in your headspace so you are responding as if you were that child or for people like me that in reality a chunk of you is always in a child-like mode and that in effect you are an adult sized child.
Now interesting at a mainstream spanking site of all places there was a link placed to an online magazine that used a actual 1936 test for Emotional Age that people such as psychologists did use to assess the emotional maturity of people as distinct from going just by chronological age.
As it happened I did it which involved answering with a Yes or No a series of twenty-five questions based on certain scenarios, a marking scheme and a calculation to convert the marks to assessed Emotional Age.
The result I got from this was shockingly close to how I had assessed in my own head my my emotional age as I know to be very truthful I am 'immature' in certain respects and not able to function at an adult level.
The test score made me 11.3 years old.  I have maintained for a good number of years I was around  10 and not older than 12 simply because I never 'felt' older, able to carry what anyone older could and it was obvious even in childhood that was so.
Now let's go back to that assertion and again consider if I am 'age playing' here or not?
NO-what is going on is the handling by the standards more of my own era of a 'child' in effect -me- by adults who of necessity have to be parental, have to do things and set boundaries, reinforcing them strictly.
That's the goddam truth.

Seeing the overall picture.

One thing I find there tends to be rather a lot about is static, stuff that somehow just sets you off in a downward trend regardless of source which may be the tense political situations  such as that over "Brexit" here in the U.K. anything connected to President Trump without getting into any actual discourse, we all know it's about or things perhaps more closer to home such as family and related issues where no one appears to be the one to dial it back.
It's one reason while I believe in being informed about what is going on in the world, I don't make a point of checking out the news hour by hour nor spending time I could be engaged in more pleasanter personal talk discussion at length such issues.
It's also a reason for spending time away from the electrons, making a point of being switched off (cellphone in pocket for emergencies only) and spending a good hour or so in the outdoors tuning in to the more calming sounds of nature, just taking your time enjoying the good that is around us rather than the other stuff that takes the headlines and front pages.
That's the trouble I feel with this totally switched on age we're living in, we're not getting a balence that goes beyond the talk of "fake news"  into areas where all we hear is discord that then slowly starts to alter how we view things and our reactions.
That's why what I've been trying to tackle this week by spending more time out and zoning out perceptual news updates.
The news is actually there's a lot of good about.

A Ghoulish Affair

This weekend last I was away for what is a highlight in littles life, parties, and in particular the Halloween one staged by a friend here in the Midlands which for me meant a short train journey after a bus ride and meeting with them as they dealt with some other business in town before picking me up.
Although compared with certain other events I attend this was comparatively short in terms of days away, obviously bringing things to literally add to the party soon takes up space so I needed a full complement of tote bags and case.
Having arrived back, the first task was to get the fire light and a brew on because three more people were staying overnight on the Friday after finding a good spot tm to put my stuff as with fourteen of us being here for Saturday and Sunday space in the front room in particular would be at a premium.
Some things I brought for Saturday's buffet  were taken out and the Pumpkin the host had brought for me saving trying to carry that on the train was paid for.
As well by prior arrangement I'd be sleeping in their so it made sense to put what I needed at hand but not in other folks way.
I sorted out my advance Christmas card pile for folk and got out my Hello Kitty white and pink plushie.
It wasn't long before the first two guests arrived which as our host was otherwise  detained I let in and by the time the last one of the day had made it it was time to get some food going.
We had a big pork chop with well cooked rind, roast potatoes from the garden which I washed for the host and Andi helped with vegetables.
The remainder of the evening was taken up with much conversation punctuated with bangs from a local firework display.
Come Saturday morning I was up fairly early in a grey jumper and wine coloured pleated skirt ready to take my pills and fix a spot of breakfast after rounding up stray cups and glasses.
 As people were coming later on, I had a few things to do of which one was to help out - it's 2018 and I'm expected to do something(!) - and that involved converting Gingerbread persons into Gingerbread Girls by decorating them.

I used eatable cake icing to add eyes, tops and skirts for them 

I made a number of variations on a theme which included one as a girl soccer player.
By about 13:00 hours most people had arrived so our Host and Andi set on making Burger with fried onion and to which another and brought salad together with sauces to add to suit your own taste.
By about 14:25 the last four guest had arrived in time for theirs.
Soon it was time for Fred and Florence's Exceeding Good Food Hunt which was a kind of treasure hunt out of doors where you had to find one item for which there was a prize which then lead to clue for the next and so on until we got to the last one where everyone had something - for me it was a caramel filled chocolate bar.

The next event was also out of doors, namely Pumpkin Carving to which several people had brought various tools to get into the pumpkin with and most of us remembered first time to save the top we'd cut out ready for the tea light to be fitted.

Finished mine looked a bit like this.
We went indoors to clean up and otherwise get ourselves ready for the cold buffet that included Pizza, pork pies (drools), salad and a home made trifle with cream.

By just after 19:00 it was time to put on warmer attire as it was time for our bonfire to be lit a safe distance from us which was a good idea as it turned a bit breezy. I had my Puma trackpants on.
It roared loudly with much crackling as people held sparklers waving them about.
Then we started our firework display oohing and aahing to the vibrant colours and sounds.

The display ended with two fireworks dedicated to members of our group who'd passed away.
After a short break it was time for the music quiz which had food connections where a tune was played and you had to guess the answer. Sammy won a cabbage for it!
The was much lively conversation until just before one in the morning when I got to bed.
I was as ever the first up and dressed this time in a green jumper - our host likes green apparently - ready to take my tablets and have a cup of tea as gradually everyone got up and about.
We had a bacon sandwich  to keep us going before we went to a gastro-pub within walking distance for a meal together before we all set off as some people had three hours or more to travel and it is a nice way to end a weekend together.
I had a turkey roast with trimmings and sticky toffee treacle with cream which arrived very efficiently given it was really busy with diners plus regular drink trade.
Upon arrival back at our hosts venue, everyone said their goodbyes before we meet again next year and Andi kindly took myself and another to the local rail station to make our ways home which for me included a taxi straight home as Sunday buses are infrequent and in any event don't run to our estate on that day.
I'd like to thank our host for a well put together party with fun events, everyone who helped out in various ways and for just being a gas to spend time with.

Reflections on Ghoulish Party weekend

While on the other blog an account of this weekends activities will be posted Monday because it takes time from arrival back to get it typed up to fit my publishing schedule  I will write a bit around how the week that included it went.

One of the first things I can honestly say was I actually got myself a workable plan together for both dealing with being away such as making sure I had my blog posts ready and also from the point of view of getting myself personally ready which hasn't always been good.

I managed to get the packing neatly done in good time in such as a way to help spread the load as I was bringing a bit more for the event than I usually did making a check list for the stuff so I could be sure I had it packed.

I also tried to do things in associated groups such as whole day changes being done in batches to lesson the chance of anything not making its way in and as ever sorting out money into that I'd need travelling with plenty of change and that I'd need later on.

I did remember to phone to let the person picking me up I was on my way and to pay attention to anything they were saying regarding any possible delays on their part.

Equally I was pretty helpful tidying up as needed, washing up without needing reminding and helping out in the kitchen.

I often struggle with following what is being said especially when theirs a lot background noise or other conversations going on but  I did manage to understand and use what was said pretty well this time.

As well this year I felt more junior than had before, going more with just being that little/middle. 

I think all over I did pretty good this time.

Sparkle!

Well folks after the weekend I am back, with a half a day before this blog is due so where is a post I made earlier on while I was googling around as you do when I spotted this lovely poem which seamed apt for those of us whole struggle with various aspects of our lives.

Sparkle In Your Eye:


When I look at you, I see the sparkle in your eye, 
It tells me whats true and never tells a lie.
The sparkle in your eye, 
Even when you are sad, never does it cry.
Whenever it expresses its feelings, 
It tells me straight away, 
What you are stealing, 
Without doing a survey.
It tells when you'll fall, 
So I'll catch you like a ball.
It's the sparkle in your eye that says, 
You'll make it in the next couple of days.
The sparkle in your eye, 
Never, ever shall it die. 


By Ulveena Aitzaz from Lahore


Poetry was one thing I really enjoyed at school, reading learning and reciting it in front of the class, traditional European as well as Japanese styles.