Rent a Bridesmaid

Recently I picked up a copy of book I'd thought about getting late last year but as things are want to do with me at times I'd forgotten all about it, bought a copy  and sat across a few days reading it.

The story is about a nine year old girl, Tilly who can scarcely believe it when her best friend and class mate, Matty, is offered the role of being a bridesmaid for she is as much a tomboy as Tilly is more girly girl and really wasn't looking forward to it.
Tilly's parents had split up and the dress is very much the focus of Tilly's longing for her parents to be reunited as she missed no longer living with Mom.
After her friend had worn it and it had been cleaned, Matty offers her the dress as she could never see herself ever wearing it again and this leads into Tilly's favourite daydream of being a bridesmaid in the must beautiful dress, walking behind the bride and after talking it through with her best friend resolves to sort this by advertising herself as a Bridesmaid for rent at the local store.

This is the dress and most beautiful it is too.
The dress leads to her meeting different people such as an older couple, a same sex couple of professional people and a family who had planned a large church wedding with five other bridesmaids, all of which enrich her life.
The one thing sadly all of this cannot do is the very thing she longs for the most -to reunite her family- so when her Mom who it transpires later on hadn't been well mentally does come to see her after Tilly appears on a tv program about weddings, her hopes are dashed .
This said there does seem to be a relationship blossoming between Miss Hope her teacher and her dad and maybe if there's to be a sequel Tilly will be the bridesmaid at that wedding!
One of things I liked about it was the exploration  of the friendship between Matty and Tilly, that although being in so many ways polar opposites not just their personalities but lifestyles and that despite this they really do gel, becoming best friends. That comes over so well in how it is written showing how disagreements that for those of who remember just high emotional we were around their ages soon get minded with some tlc.
To conclude although on the face of it it's a relatively uncomplicated story about a girl and her dress it has more depth exploring the nature of friendship you can see at a more grown up level very intensely heartfelt and emotional coming over through intelligent use of subtle nuances of mood and character. It is a great joy to read.

Regressed thoughts

Once upon a time, would of been around January 2015 I had a Tumblr having been there for a couple of years and found the regressive and caregiver/little communities of the that time, realizing really this is what I'm about and always had a clear need for.

 

It just arises from within me because I have this rather more child-like mind that's always around which is often good cos unlike a person who who may of lost having more of an adult sense of self, to be blunt, I never had it.
So it's not a bad thing at all for me.

The thing is like a good number of us I have the other side of this thing as part of the whole who gets into stompy rants, lashes out and gets into grandstanding displays of defiance.

That's when I started The Woodshed tumblr as I started to realize there was a missing half from the regression and having a need for a caregiver.

I had realized I needed that caregiver and ideally other trusted adults to step back in with firm lecturing to remind me of where I was and how I should be acting.
But that wasn't all.
There are so many times I feet this is how I wanted to be treated.

 

I have still the need to be corrected as a child, not helped by not being corrected sufficiently that I have no still idea of how to behave at times.
It appeared I wasn't alone in that and actually I wanted old fashioned paternalistic spanking because it could break my cycles of defiance and not listening and a warm smarting bottom helped me pay attention and co-operate with them to help me behave.
I'm thankful for this as I'm a lot calmer and more in control of my feelings than I was way back then.

The way it all goes post

It's been a jolly wet start to the week from Saturday, Sunday which was pretty decent to the depths of Monday when it rained all day on and off sometimes really heavily which really brings out the easily lashing side of me.
It's writing about that in conjunction with stuff about the other bits of my life what keeps this blog real! 

This life has reversals in for a reason so having a uniform to wear or if had to be anywhere to change into is one facet of my life from which all other things run from as we no longer have things running from a adult setting.

I love comic strips, always did but there's a lot of me in her fighting authority every inch and yet deep down craving it so as much as you feel like saying "You Beast" or something stonger, actually your glad to be under his control.

She may get away with wearing jeans but I'm in pinafore dresses and skirts, very the little miss who is reminded of why she needs handling this way, feeling better for everything such a life entails as unpleasant as the reminder is.

You'd never change it for anything else.

Fashion Musings

Cute need not be all frills or dresses whatever you might see at various places or be told and particularly in littles circles either as actual bio-kid girls aren't and don't.
Take these jeans for example. Denim for instance is usually seen more 'boyish' material no doubt for being made into the jeans that boys and men in the frontierlands worked in for its hard wearing qualities.
But actually these are so cute that they go even a little beyond even tomboyish sorts like me with the ever popular and uber cool Hello Kitty motifs especially as show they are teamed up  with matching cute over the shoulder bag.
There's no denying it's...feminine.

Down our wood

It's been a week of the rain until the weekend that takes me away from it from as much as love being out of doors but the outdoor life is the one I prefer not least when it's so relaxing.

I'm fortunate this part of the North-west Midlands has lovely countryside even woods in walking distance I can just visit and just spent time just watching nature at its own more less hectic timescale and fields to watch and birds tractors pass.

Little and Middle footwear

 

Much of this is very much me, going back almost a decade in my exploration of what being an adult little means and how as one I'd present, the just above the knee skirt, the long just below the knees socks even the pink shows although I'm not high on super sugary dressing but platforms?

I think it would be harder for me to walk and balance in such shoes with my physical disabilities with something so bulky on my feet even if the refinement is obviously more Middle wear for things like parties and dancing.

Canvas soled footwear was very much a part of my childhood and for good number a part of their casual side later on in life but the Pastel Galaxy tennis shoes have a allure that's just for us being so cute and girlish

Life (and why this blog is as it is)

After last week's past in present post, I felt like writing a bit more around what being this girl means and why it is this blog is the way it is.

Given this Covid thing we're going through has cut a hole through what normally would be happening around this part of the year, I feel it's a good idea to remind ourselves about it.

 I am somewhat more visual but in may respects this illustration sums a whole chunk of it up really well and in case you were curious some people can see "the music" in record grooves.

The first thing is we all dressed differently, showing that how we feel expressing our inner sense of being is different, I veer more toward the girl on the far left, others in this context might choose a party dress. It's all good!

We are all having fun, sharing chit-chat, sucking our Pop through straws. That sharing is what we do when at meets playing with each other and letting each other play individually with our dolls, stuffies and other toys. I am grateful my little/middle friends let me share things as it means a lot allowing us to build our friendships. 

There is music playing that we are sharing. It may be my home stereo component system is more technically 'better' than their phonograph, which I had a similar model when I was in my tweens but it is being used to share music, to enjoy it's playing so we have our records out.

That's the function of music in my life and there are 'places' I share it; it's not about the 'hifi', it's about the joy of listening to it which is why on this blog I do write about it, tossed in with the dolls, stuffies and other cute stuff.

There is also grown up supervision about keeping everything safe and ensuring we behave because it's easy for things to get out of hand and you mightn't see it and I sure don't!

The biggest thing in all of this is just innocuous fun!