Accidents or just carelessness?

We are approaching Christmas which is where I tend to take a break from blogging at various sites and on here simply because there are plenty of things that need to be done before Christmas Day and that eats into the time.

Time and its usage has to have been an honest issue with me for years as for one thing I tend to get easily distracted and drawn into things other than what I originally intended to do that really could wait and on others it's been too easy to let someone else do something that I could of done that would of helped them out.

I wrote a few years back about spillages and breakages because all too often in the past they were ignored and excused because I am more prone to them being un-coordinated.

That rather ignored such things like I need to learn to do things in a more slower, careful way, that by doing that I put myself and anyone passing at risk of injury and that breakages that are the result of carelessness are not accidents and require me to be given consequences and made to put them right.

Spanking me firmly on the spot does help to get that over, to think first before doing things and has helped together with talking about how I can do better sharing tips and examples.

Just shrugging the shoulders doesn't really help.

Wednesday ramblings

While the countdown continues toward Christmas following some discussion at FA I thought I'd set down my thoughts.

Everyone does this thing different which can make co-existing on some sites problematic because you can fall between two stools.

Fundamentally I am very much a age regressor, a person who goes back to the time and in real time instincts of my childhood a girl who plays and goes to school where things evolve through just being in of that state of mind in real time with no script, no discussion of what any *scene* might include.

School may not for obvious reasons be a actual school but would involve real studying with lessons being taught  and as I'm in England the wearing of a uniform cos practically all children wear on to school that is proscribed for you.

It's a totally fetish free, non sexual non bdsm thing with no power exchange suited for those of us who developmentally are more like children and do have vulnerabilities that could be exploited by predatory adults. 

What can complicate it I am the product emotionally of the era of cp in the home and at school where that was just part of childhood, it didn't have the bdsm connections people assume today - it was often the go to discipline we had.

Because of that, spanking can feature if by the standards of that era it is what you'd of been given - not pre-arranged or asked for in advance just cleared in case its needed so consent is there.

That additional element tilts things as some adult site won't take the whole "as a child" side with spanking as they see that as adult content (and I was spanked from early childhood so for me its anything but) while more minor friendly site understandably don't want any content of that sort not least when official attitudes have changed and it may be illegal for it to be used today.  

For me then it's age regression with the spanking of my childhood included.

From how I see it

Our attitudes and behaviours for some of us are things that we do struggle with that can be in an age regressed setting, within age playing scenarios and for some more in the everyday adult world.

For some of us situations that might be irritants for others become overwhelming that either we try to control others to control how their behaviours affect us or we ourselves project our emotions through lashing out at them.

The problem with those approaches is they ignore the everyday social boundaries by flipping the attention those things that you cannot control which only amplifies our reactions.

It is really ourselves that we alone can control adequately if we put our minds to it that really is the more fruitful approach to take and sometimes we see things in a very different way than others might.

There are times with me it has to come out before I really start paying attention to sorting out my behaviour.

Future arrivals

I don't know if we'll ever see this outside but there is always something approaching the feel of camaraderie whenever we are together having fun together and yes if you hadn't worked it out I do look rather more like the girl of far left even if I'd happily lose a couple of inches in height.

You see unless you have actually spent time as a little or middle then as much as I'm of fan of online groups and clubs you are missing that face to face interaction with other age regressors being in effect children together playing with the spontaneity that brings, recreating that time and space when that was all that mattered.

Everybody's 'day' is bound to be different, we played with differing things, watch different things on tv and with the exception of "Smartphone culture", the thing is they have more in common with each other than you might think.

 

That means however 'old' in terms of birth certificate age  you might be you're all around the same level which makes sense as childhood and from that childhood revisited is a space a person from a level of social, emotional, physical and intellectual development resides and that is how it is with me.

Being in with others is what I love the most and where god willing we'll be next year when this pandemic can be laid to rest.

Learning your lessons the hard way

 

 

The kind of scenario every adult little girl can relate to as she is very much put in her place.

*Done in Opera Browser

Covid and I

Within the last couple of weeks, there's been a number of things that normally would of happened such as going to friends for a Halloween party bash for littles where we can play, make things like lanterns and finish off with a big bonfire that haven't happened thanks to covid that took out summer LG camp for good measure.

It may not of helped with us going into Lockdown 2.0 again on November 5th in England but even if we'd of stayed within the tier system, the venue was in a Teir 2 high one as all of Staffordshire and my district was so meeting up in houses overnight was out of the question.

I am struggling pretty much with this pandemic - I'll admit it - with the uncertainty about when and even if it will be over anytime soon, frequent rule changes and changed routines in the shops and even in travelling.

One example of how much even the mundane has changed is on two occasions of getting things on Ebay, I've had messages to say the people were now self isolating so there would be delays until they were better before things could be posted out.

Then there was a major outbreak in one sorting office nearby that resulted in industrial action delaying mail.

Then one relative contracts covid from working in a Care Home but is recovering and then only this Saturday I am phoned to say my Aunt is in bed laid up with it too.

Thus you really begin to wonder when it is gonna end. 

Remaking the past

As I remarked several posts ago to be mentally in the space of a schoolgirl isn't to say you permanently just do lessons and wear school attire such as a formal school uniform all day long because in that life you had other things too.

It's an element of the whole adult schoolgirl thing that does put me off in someways because while to them there's the fantasy element it's neither based on the whole reality of that time and for me it's that having age dysphoria I am that child still whatever my birth age may say.

For me then outside of things like formal uniform when doing lessons or 'in your best' with a caregiver wearing more casual attire like shorter skirts  such as skater skirts but with knee and ankle socks rather than tights in the way that you did back then makes more sense.