Closing the door

I'm a bit annoyed this week when just remarking on the Grok controversy that a.n.other had posted in an "off topic" thread as it applied to adults whose images were manipulated in sexual ways or children depicted sexually you're told they agree with some of your observations, they are concerned about the themes you spoke (very briefly) of and that you're told to keep things sweet and little girl like.

Sorry, but all isn't sweetness and light some of us were abused as children sexually and given the many issues we've had from people seeing us as "debbie downers", liars and much worse expecting to go crawl under a rock and never mention either what happened or that it can being told in effect mentioning something pertinent to our experience of being LG can't even be referenced (we're not talking graphic detail just saying it happens).

We live with the effects every day and in our LG lives, a person who I won't name needed to taken outside by me and told in no uncertain terms just going behind you and grabbing  you is deeply traumatic and they were to never, ever do it again at a meet up just underscores and and wishing away the idea some of us like sadly some actually children are living with this grates.

Shutting people out was a textbook emotional response for me for many many years and I guess it can be justified as a means of preventing others actions from hurting your inner feelings.

It seems a lot easier than dealing with their drama or give them another chance to hurt you even more. I do that sometimes when I get tired of the drama or I know they are gonna say something hurtful I just cut off the relationship cold and walk away. 

 
The trouble was it drifted into shutting people out to prevent any possible hurt learning to deal with relationships.

I've had it with being silenced.

Away thoughts

One thing about being away is there's so much on and you don't have servants to do stuff for you while you play, make things and so on so you all have to "muck in", tidying away, table duties and so on which isn't untypical of being a child in a family.

We could when they did things like get food and running around sorting you out whenever you needed it but your folks aren't away with you and we have to step up.
 

I helped out setting up, clearing and even doing some washing up as not everything goes in the dishwasher and then putting it all away.

I also helped loading and unloading the car even though my wrist hurt a bit too.

I did okay so the lessons of past years relearned are working.

Top shelf edition! (Very SFW!)

Been a bit busy this week tidying a few things up, sorting  somethings I don't really use but are in great shape for charity and dusting -atchoo! - the top shelf in my room.

 Well when doing that I found something I hadn't mentioned before on here that is I just loved Sesame Street for the characters and especially the message it put over in what could be  very selfish and commercial set of values found elsewhere. 

That was a plushie my parents bought me some years ago.

Other interesting things include in a totally unplanned conversation with the legendary Grump hearing him give acceptance to those of us who are adult littles who love dressing and "playing" or otherwise re-enacting more the age we feel whither it's a school based thing or more the life outside of you enjoy from that time.

That was pretty much what I had been up to this weekend at the Easter party, enjoying the Egg Hunt.

The only thing that matters is in being our authentic selves we deal with, to the best of our abilities, those most essential adult responsibilities we have.

 

Issues in dressing Little

Sometimes it seems I'm really outside the ideas of our little group when beyond replica school type attire it comes to dressing more as a younger girl which is really rather more where I feel from the inside.

It's almost as if everything we had been through in the seventies and eighties never mind the nineties just never happened as girls slacks and jeans are frowned up for not being "girlie" despite being for girls and probably more suited for some sorts of activities.

You really can't argue this top and shorts set is feminine - you'd never get a boy in them in a million years - and yet this and it's more grown up ladies floral shorts or culottes are frowned upon but if I was doing handstands isn't it a better idea 

There's really nothing wrong at all with dresses and I do like pastel colours for good measure but just what is so wrong with having a variety of outfits in your wardrobe and to wear when we're together depending on just how you feel?

Actual girls today do and the last thing I heard was they're still very much girls so just what is the problem???

Changes and what stays the same

As more astute people will have noticed, the blogging cycle has altered for a variety of reasons of which one is the access to it's audience has been been impacted  by the demise of one social media, Google + and by the ban on adult content being hosted on tumblr.
I can scream and scream that actually this blog isn't adult content in that it's not about sexual kinks and everything to do with the rerun of the kind of discipline I grew up with but there's every probability they'd just shut down my entire account no if buts or maybes so that only leaves FA and the spankingart wiki list of blogs about spanking that have any kind of link to here.
Of course this blog isn't and hasn't always been about the red bottom in my life but the things that may lead up to such as stresses and other sorts of issues so it's in part a vent blog that hopefully leads to me not earning a spanking.
That is also another difference between this blog and others that isn't recognized by these broad stroked rules which is it's not me writing 'spanking romances' for titilation it's about writing about actual spankings and how that works with me.
It's a privileged position that deserves respect for having this brought in within the context of being in a very age regressed juvenile adult but child life to provide the guidance I need and can learn from best and I want to ensure that this blog is the best expression of just that.
Not writing a spanking per week for an audience.
It's also about growth, becoming more effective even though I have fixed limitations because I can be trained to make more of opportunities and make better judgement calls consistently too which can involve spanking me when I let myself down.
Here's to the future of this blog.

Spanking on site

This is being written during a period where I am trying to stay calm, reading comics and the odd sports feature like on Women's Soccer and listening a bit to some music to deal with the visit today of that person, probably a woman for the face to face assessment apart from wondering where one cd ordered last week has ended up.

One thing around comics at least as far as  comics from the past go is as was the era I read them they did reference spanking from time to time as the star of the cartoon strip acted all cranky and that.

This as Britishers would recognize is Minnie the Minx from the Beano from the 1977 edition of the Beano Annual judging by the drawing style, clearly in deep trouble with dad being dealt with the way many of us were at home (and I might add at boarding school).

Now in 2019 a number of sites that permit spanking content have a "No actual or depiction of a minor being spanked is permitted" policy which in theory means I couldn't actually post something I read aged nine, bought for me by responsible adults (my parents) from a publication aimed for children.

Equally as I think a number of us are aware spanking was 'at the movies' when we grew up too so again a straight still of which a number can be found easily online  showing either an actual child being spanked (there's a girl in Elvis's "At Happened at the Worlds Fair" from 1963 who is on film or an adult playing a child role who was and ditto tv like Little House On The Prairie or the classic 1969 film Kes where a group of boys are caned.

The aims of such policies is quite right - to prevent the circulation of images of children being spanked as adult titillation and children being abused to provide same - but something is awry in its application on sites.

Another though relevant consideration to someone like me is I'm in a gymslip - an adult by law but looking like a school child - and I was shown bent over chair but clothed with at the edge a person with say a tawse or slipper would that fall foul on grounds of 'depiction or not if submitted?

See, it's not that black and white is it as these things  are written.