Showing posts with label adult child. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adult child. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 12, 2024

1989 round up

Just relaxing a bit this morning after a rather busy Monday as I type this weeks entry up trying to avoid political back and forth as two be honest I don't feel the two main parties really have much of a clue on how to tackle the current main issues.

Anyway two years after general election a few decades back was really when much of this really started to come together having realized I hadn't really left school even if definitely walked out of the gate when during a period between jobs I was at a careers advice appointment when looking through the window I saw a playground and my mind shot back to school recess.

That was always the thing with me, the sense my head was in space that was much younger than what my peers were and that really I never had a sense of really relating to older children never mind any adult later on.

No, what I seemed to be stuck in and have a need to be as just being able to live more at my own rather child-like level so apart from buying things like Gordon the Gopher from Children's BBC to play with I began to experiment more around dressing younger whenever I could which was easier given I was a bit thin with girls hoodies and even school uniform.

I just felt more at one with who I was, liking the me in the mirror rather than glancing at an imposter who felt she was just acting out a role all the time.

1989 was when I started ti get back to being myself.

Wednesday, January 31, 2024

Are we still standing?


It really didn't matter how you got to be you, any background story you might of had and how far along that road you've travelled these years you changed and yet other bits of you remain.

And really that's a-okay as nature is really just the same when you think about it.

If something just isn't fitting in right you can change that but you certainly don't need to change everything or create a whole new persona.

Wednesday, January 11, 2023

Getting back to the beginning

 

What this blog has been all about has at times got a bit confused as sometimes bits of my life have come to the forefront which may of been important in some respects but left the wider picture somewhat overshadowed.

At it's heart is confused, mixed up adult child who is still trying to navigate her life when most of her peers managed it decades ago who is fundamentally a a good girl who does get a bit stroppy and agitated because she find understanding the world and its often unspoken rules very hard going.

She may make bad choices, act in ways that require her to be chastised but she is not bad, she wants to do better and with help can do better.

Her heart is in the right place, she has  an innocence and purity about her that others can often read incorrectly because they lack that, only seeing intent where with her there never would be any.

Indeed you could say they undermine her very poor confidence by the game they play and how they keep her away from the things that help her meet her responsibilities and leave her feeling bad about herself.

Jo is not bad - just a good girl needing a helping hand.

Wednesday, July 27, 2022

Awareness or Up Yours!

Conversations don't always run the way you anticipate.

It may be that for whatever a reason you didn't see you were crossing a firm line with someone  either because the tone was such it was "low voltage" failing to register that "back off" feeling.

It might of been that having done that you still felt you were wronged and could negotiate, mouthing off ignorant that your very words were being heard loud and clear.

I've sometimes been known to mouth off with a distinct lack of awareness of just how disrespectful it was not least with me being very much the junior partner in this situation.

Sometimes you just have to call us back for an an additional spanking to make sure we've really learned our lesson and just who is in charge.

Wednesday, August 21, 2019

Changes and what stays the same

As more astute people will have noticed, the blogging cycle has altered for a variety of reasons of which one is the access to it's audience has been been impacted  by the demise of one social media, Google + and by the ban on adult content being hosted on tumblr.
I can scream and scream that actually this blog isn't adult content in that it's not about sexual kinks and everything to do with the rerun of the kind of discipline I grew up with but there's every probability they'd just shut down my entire account no if buts or maybes so that only leaves FA and the spankingart wiki list of blogs about spanking that have any kind of link to here.
Of course this blog isn't and hasn't always been about the red bottom in my life but the things that may lead up to such as stresses and other sorts of issues so it's in part a vent blog that hopefully leads to me not earning a spanking.
That is also another difference between this blog and others that isn't recognized by these broad stroked rules which is it's not me writing 'spanking romances' for titilation it's about writing about actual spankings and how that works with me.
It's a privileged position that deserves respect for having this brought in within the context of being in a very age regressed juvenile adult but child life to provide the guidance I need and can learn from best and I want to ensure that this blog is the best expression of just that.
Not writing a spanking per week for an audience.
It's also about growth, becoming more effective even though I have fixed limitations because I can be trained to make more of opportunities and make better judgement calls consistently too which can involve spanking me when I let myself down.
Here's to the future of this blog.

Wednesday, January 10, 2018

Age regression and age play


Age Regression is when you revert to a younger mindset with its own interests and means of expression that arise from your own past compared to your chronologically  age appropriate ones especially as an adult.
For some people this can be a coping mechanism from trauma or sense in which the current world is 'too much' for them to cope with so moving to one where you are following more a child-like role enjoying play activities while another acting more as a caretaker, guardian or quasi-parent takes on the oversight that most adults most of time assume for themselves, being cared for directly is not uncommon.
This as with me ties very much into not in certain critical respects having developed the adult skills required to handle and assume those roles and responsibilities.
It's less acting a role out as just 'being' that person as it happens and because it can lead to complications working out that balance between the side of you that needs to be big and that inner  kid where their own 'age' and with it, needs, because that side has its own development
What it is that you do during that period and what it is certainly has been at the centre of some controversy from the very beginning  because it takes us to some very awkward points because for much of place especially online the term used for what you do whilst in that headspace is "Age Play" but it has become linked with other things.
It is undeniably the case that some people have used the presentation as someone younger  as a warm up for adult sexual behaviour but that has always been an act put on by and for that purpose alone and that the sexualization of childhood rightly concerns people. It is beyond argument too such a sexual side to it is kink based with 'sexy schoolgirl' as interchangeable as that of 'Office girl sexpot' as a role that they put on.
Age Regression though is never about this, it is about letting that child side out to play as an actual bio child would in itself but that very word 'play' because of the context it has been used in suggests playing a role, which  it isn't but more acting more in accordance with the regressed adult child you feel at the psychological level.
Think of it more as letting the breaks of adult behaviour inhibitors where instead of trying to act grown up because of social pressure and ridicule for being the adult child you are, you 'play' the way that bio-child within feels and if their chronological age was say ten, the kind of life you would a  actual ten your old would playing, reading etc with the social responsibilities that child would too including caretaker roles for another adult to look after situations you need help with in order for you to feel safe. To do that is literally Age Playing, acting in accordance ones mental and developmental age and with me that's painfully apparent because at no point can I relate with you as in an adult to adult context because mentally I'm never there. I'm always looking at and for you to being the 'adult' and yes look after the adult-child me.
In plain speak I have the need to be parented and a parent authority figure to do so.
Just saying that is profoundly shocking for some people and there are others who simply refuse to accept this isn't a game of "I want a daddy to play with me" rather than doing the tax returns that I could just snap my fingers and leave.
Indeed that was at the core of an unpleasant public ridiculing on one adult spanking related site where I was attacked by someone who could not see this before being banned but that whole experience shook me up because in effect an adult humiliated a child wrapped in an adults body for being themselves.
That's why actually understanding this whole thing matters and why I'm talking about on the tenth anniversary of this blog.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Seasonal reminders

It may be coming up to Christmas but I'm not too old for a spanking and the threat or no presents if I don't buck my ideas up.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Bring you into alignment

School Uniform is preferred wear indoors and with subtle adjustments outdoors too not least because the act of wearing it implies an acceptance of rules and power over your own feelings to the point what you wear and how you present is determined by your Caregiver in a adult little/Caregiver setting.
It is hardly surprising then that it is often linked in with the use and for some of the return to regular unscripted corporal punishment for breaches of rules around attitudes and behaviour although it doesn't have to be and you may have other more casual play clothes too.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Delivering the message



A powerful, well delivered caning that leaves it stinging with burning weals across my bottom is highly effective in motivating me and something no one should be afraid to deliver when the going gets tough.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Stopping the pouting and dress as the sissy you are

Quite often we talk other things on this blog such as "being little", interests that align more to that such as children's books, cartoons and given some of our issues with regulating emotions, spanking  although it's not by any means a focus.

This week we're going to talk something else that does matter as a part of my identity, being a Sissy, part of the mix of me.

If you are a sissy, then it's not a matter of dressing as the kid you were, often you were prevented from expressing yourself at school, in various youth movements and at home so it was all very secretive.

Now most of those constraints are over, just where do you begin in being you?

We wore rugged and sometimes itchy attire having memories at 14 wearing very itchy long trousers at school that were so irritating to my skin because they were' "the rules" but what we wanted and if we could find a moment alone we did was were girls attire because it felt softer, more comfortable and, yes very pretty.

Once we did it, we knew deep down that was what we wanted to wear.

Personally I feel as a Sissy we need to start with something like soft, satin babydolls and slips and definitely matching panties, making them a permanent part of our lives because you feel so much better in yourself for dressing the way your head always wanted.

Now of course as a Little Sissy you won't dress like your older sister might going out, but you may wear soft vests and matching patterned knickers and either plain tights or socks, knee length for school looks and ankle with cute motifs when watching tv, playing or having fun.

While you love skirts and dresses and I have lots, you'll have girls sports shorts too which if you're a bit concerned about being seen out, aren't noticed by most going about their business.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Yes Sir. Here's the cane, Sir



Involving you in your own punishment such as fetching the implement helps in making it the more memorable and therefore most effective in stopping the behaviour that lead to it.

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Thoughts best kept to yourself

You often felt like saying it but knew for well you'd only end with more of the same and to be honest is for MY OWN GOOD I am spanked.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Monday, July 9, 2007

Being the uniformed charge...

Being in uniform is very much a part of being the adult school girl as if she was back in the past very much subject to the authority and discipline of responsible adults in her life thus a collection of tools to administer corporal punishment exist and are used as a matter of course with me.


It is always applied in ways such as this to ensure my smarting bottom will hurt for a good while to imprint the reminder  to behave effectively.

*It is important to note this blog is not talking about *actual* under 18's only adults in connection with spanking and in the era where they were subject to it.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Out with the old

That moment as you survey the scene having to stand attentively seeing what is before you.
 You and it are so acquainted you just bend over the desk as he pulls your skirt over you back and pulls your knickers right down ready to set your bottom on fire with a junior cane

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Acceptance of control as an adult but child

The world and us can be different and what some of us are looking for is really a cross between old school authoritarian parenting and benevolent mistress to set the direction for us rather than trying to figure a way by ourselves.

We are desiring a instilling of your ideas and moulding to help us be the best us we can given we're clueless about how we see the world and the world sees us.

I'd like that person to work on getting me to presenting in more overly feminine ways bringing out the frills to go with dollies I can be playing more with rather than getting super obsessed with the groan up world and super anxious

Because I am not an adult developmentally  I need a adult parental character in charge to keep me on track and provide the no-nonsense discipline I need in my life which is why they keep the tools at hand to help me behave myself.