Working on Jo

We've been working on who I am and possible looks for me now for a while starting to really  get somewhere. I can do and look good in shorter skirts so just imagine what could happen if you took me in here, you weren't afraid to insist I bough a whole outfit and gave me a fixed budget.

 

You'd seen get a good result, a Jo dressed more like the girl she feels as shy as is with a bit of Big Sis push looking more like this.

Those plaid skirts would be so right for me....

Lessons outdoors

If I could of gone back in time I'd of loved to had a school building where we had a big playground to do music and movement in rather than us all being crammed into the community hall and some proper play equipment where we had non apart from the boys goal posts.
Our uniforms were similar to this actually except the boys shirts were gray and wore shorts.
I always looked good in red and gray so if was to have a new uniform as a adult child to wear at something like a Prep School for adults, I'd like one like this.

Experimenting with a tartan Middles look

Well, here we are in a hand made tartan miniskirt with a most suitable 14" length with black opaque tights on taken recently.i really love the feel of the genuine Scottish made skirt swishing around as i walk in it and maybe turning a few heads.

i may not feel up to posting much over the next few weeks as i have an uncle who has gone into a hospice with Cancer and isn't likely to be living for very long.

Judy

A big influence on me was the comics I read and the series of stories in them some were reprints of older stories while others were more contemporary.
Some were bought for me, some were shared such as those from the big box full my first two schools had that we could read if it was recess and the weather was too bad to be outside playing and others were say second hand annuals, girls annuals specifically.
They usually featured girls dressed in their school uniforms typically Tunics (Brit Speak: Gymslips) in situations subject to adult authority, disciplined as we were as they felt fit as it was in that era.

 

It was a fictional world of girls I followed not least for it allowed me to set myself as one them in my imagination, a what might of been and a clear influence on how now I present as a Junior girl being an adult little and her world.

Prep school for Jo?

It's seldom off my mind however bizarre it may seem to some but to be absolutely honest I just feel like doing a year or so in a Prep School but for over 18's who feel or developmentally are very much 8 to 14 year olds.
Something like actual lessons with day trips out and assignments to hand in completed and shared meal and recess times.
I really feel I need that structure and to be treated more like the child I am on the inside.

Home life

 

Sometimes I wonder where so much of my attitudes and behaviour comes from but it came to me the other day that there were several episodes that shaped it.

One was the occasions when I was at home where in theory at least my younger brother was looking after me although if this chronological age thing had anything to do with it it would of been the other way around.

Ours was a house like a good many back then that had a coal fire in the front room although we did burn the odd bit of wood and that although it wasn't a proper log burner that having spent what seemed like ages getting it going with firelighters, tindling and coal, you needed to keep well lit until it was time for bed in order for us to stay all cozy playing or watching tv.

He always seemed put out to be this kind of situation, thinking somehow my being disabled cost home unspecified lost opportunities and for good measures had a number of crazy ideas of one tended to be someone just HAD to make it possible for him to spend his money and still get more.

Unfortunately he took to psychologically bullying me in attempts to make up the difference, thinking if he kept it up I'd hand over either my pocket money or holiday funds to him that day and if that wasn't enough he come back the next day for more.

Well this particular evening it must of turned toward Eight PM as it had gotten dark and Mom and Dad had gone to some event in our district leaving him in charge as my older brother was on older teen business that you know you didn't ask much about.

 It wasn't long before he kept putting forward demands for handing over my money saying I didn't need it that week and he wanted it one after another never letting go to the point he'd really wound me up and I chucked that money right into the fire saying if was going to get it when my back was turned then that was it.

He'd never seen me really snap like that but I felt so scared in my own home with him I just did as he tried to retrieve the coins from the ash pan as the paper notes had been burnt and didn't believe my folks would take my word if I told them the truth. 

I think some of my anger and sadness comes from feeling unbelieved and insecure being taken advantage of even by your own family.

Fairly recently I told Mom about this and she was dumfounded to hear about had gone on

Mommy time

For me there is nothing so much as a Mommies love not least in the small things she does for you such as plaiting and putting your hair in bunches or in a pony tail, brushing it all the way down like the magical mane of who is her Princess you are.
Being involved matters so much to you as you wanna be Mommies little girl cos she was one once too!