Online welfare

 

Today's message is simple.

Try to spend less time staring at that thing as if your live depended upon it.

Keep tabs on what sort of content comes in your your stream: does it it make you anxious, depressed or feel like self harming?

Is it keeping you up at night?

Try to find people who you can trust to talk about what you've seen if it's troubling you.

If a site is a worry because of things like child pr0n, inappropriate content or otherwise harmful report it.

That's all folks!

The evolving world

The countdown soon enough will begin as we get into Advent  although presently here is is actually below zero today outdoors so you might well be finding your thicker tights and a well covering coat if you intend to get past the front door.

Social media and me have had a chequered history with what I found were relative respectful early sites with narrow focus that when you joined all of you saw and bought into to others that were broader.

In my earliest days of trying to find more around the world of adult littles and particularly around adult little girl forms I found the most prominent ones were occupied by "sissies" and accompanying kinks such as bdsm which is fine if that's you but it wasn't for me looking for more child-like regression at the time and some of the sexualized stuff was very off putting.

Experience Project was a very much a mixed thing being a place where people could talk about anything within categories and experience groups with the Tg groups being more occupied by sexual crossdressers but there was groundbreaking support on there for genderfluid and NB.

When that closed down, I did join Similar Worlds but I have decided to delete my account there for a variety of reasons one being seen as a whack whack whack object which was vicariously lived through by some with a amazing sense of entitlement and for another I found there just wasn't the intelligent exchanges and conversation I was wanting.

It was obvious some had never really read what I had written and that site followed Experience Projects mistake of eliminating the individual groups and grouping things under very broad headings so if you were looking in the LGBT+ section you'd see a load of posts that didn't apply to you making it difficult to get quickly the posts you were interested in.

Strange folks

 

I don't know if it's me, something around my autism or whatever but sometimes you think you're having a pretty decent conversation online and then you find its gone dead and no amount of examining afterwards shows a point you could discern a "change the subject" comment or request for clarification.

You just see this "not following each other" and gone to say their archive has this notice in the top right corner saying you may find more about why you can't access it as it is obvious at some point you were talking, they'd blocked you.

It's just so well, weird cos you'd think they'd say something first but no they block you rather like back in 2015 I remember someone at Experience Project doing just the same even though they'd initiated the conversation.

Still, blow them. I'm not blocking them myself but I'm ignoring them and will reblog anything that they might of direct from the source itself.

Evolving online times

This coming week or so is looking like a pretty draining one to be honest with large scale Political instability over here (we'll skip the groan up political stuff behind it, it's just bad shall we say) and because of upcoming changes in UK law that in likely to bring in  age verification though registering details to a provider to access some sites if if like me you're strictly sfw although how effective this might be in practise remains to be seen.
I most admit I am taking a more pragmatic approach to it because sometimes you sign up to sites and through a combination of changing interests and time constraints you really don't us them that much.
So from that point of view there are a couple of sites I have effectively outgrown that makes losing access to them no real loss but there are a few others such as FA that  I do find handy keep in touch with favourite artists and friends and they won't be adopting the scheme the UK government wants so either it slips through as they're more into commercial ie money making sites or not.
The likes of Tumblr aren't effected nor as far as I'm aware Similar Worlds.
Sometimes it's hard to believe this blog has been around in its present form for some thirteen years since I moved from a freebee on an early social media site that's no longer with us to blogger which remains a popular choice for long form blogging.
It's seen various places come and go such as Google+, Yahoo360, Geocities, friends reunited, tinier me and the experience project in all that time in a variety of interactions with people, some good, some not so good.
You could say the only real certainty is that cycle keeps on repeating itself  so having stand alone structures for your blogging still makes sense.

Do people pay attention any more?

Moving a little from really what most of last weeks entry was about one thing I do feel like talking about is just how little attention some people take to what you have posted and written on site profiles BEFORE starting to message you or even commenting on a post.
It never ceases to amaze me the level of ultra low grade messages sometimes no more than literally "Hi"  I get at one site.
Like you have chosen to open up a conversation with somebody but have offered up nothing at all to actually talk about such as what I have mentioned on my profile or my 'stories' that are about my actual life not being the works of a fictional genius when you ask dumb questions like "Have you been spanked" when in seconds you'd find an entry or two about just that by merely looking at that profile. and looking at groups and stories.
Then there is what I am open about, namely because of an industrial injury my hands are damaged to the extend I can't do as much for myself as I did needing assistance with everyday living which means I am not inclined to retell whole experiences over and over again in messages and I may not able to reply for a period because I need to keep what limited function for far more important tasks in my life than reply to your inane messages.
There is a note that clearly says that and yet so many just ignore it wanting a slice of my very limited abilities to type.
This is before we get into those who want to play 'scenes' with me even though in my life nothing not least the spanking part are 'scened' as if it's just a role play  so much that they are the agreed sanctions that happen in real time to the rules around my attitudes and behaviour I agreed with various people to try to help me and not a fun, kinky based thing.
I'm glad at SN I'm the not the only one who doesn't and doesn't like like been told I'm just sceening or role playing this.

Getting things together.

Dashing out from the rain here.

The week has had its own challenges such as the weather so I have tried to use time to get things organized that I am more inclined to leave until later such as Christmas stuff, odd bits I may take to an upcoming littles event and that. I was always a big putter off sort.
The subject of ties and girls uniforms continues to interest me as some feel the tie is inherently masculine and doesn't suit the developing girl while others point it being in some adult female uniforms.
I feel it can look smart on girls (and women).
To me the bigger crime is in not wearing it well, rather like this illustration where it is very loose around the neck and tied in such a way it is going way beyond her waist whereas it really needs to be at waist height and tucked in.

 Yesterday marked the 60th Anniversary of the British children's tv program Blue Peter that was very much a part of my childhood and I watched the one hour special edition.
Continuing on a bit from last week I have made the decision to close my littles Google + account because it was seldom used  having little going on in the feed.
It was set up more at the bequest of a person no longer in my life who had a host of issues that lead to much stepping over boundaries such as attempt to have  exclusive access, going through manic cycles where they'd post really hurtful vile comments and in any event removed much of their posts including my replies.
As all are to be removed by August next year that one might as well go as there is nothing I want from it. 
I think the way I am just being more decisive and pro-active now has shown the fruit of having one to one tuition and being subject to very much junior discipline to retrain me to make better choices and be more assertive.

The past moves as you go forward

On Monday October 8th, buried in a document around Google and Security written in very much positive language it was announced Google + was to be "Sunsetted" and by August 2019 gone.
When you strip it of that California Lab Talk, it means the service is to close but in an orderly way with it going on to say ways of saving and reusing content you created would be offered in time so no one would lose anything by that point.
The service began in 2011 originally on a invite only basis and I was able to get one via connections to a forum and this coincided with a group other people saying they wished to break from Facebook however they soon left it for the Facebook freebees.
So much for principals.
Instead ironically it became a anime/littles/lgbtqi friendly spot I shared with others posts, promoted my blog on, at the time played Candy Crush and other games onboard that site.
A kind of a playground for little me although initially  much of that happened on the slightly more grown up account I'd created for that other group


























Part of the reason that was possible while in other context that would be outing yourself as a little was down to circles which in the original form were like the above screen shot.
You made sets for specific groups and of themselves you could have any posts you made would only go to that Circle and no others unless you added other circles in or chose Public.
I could therefor send littles stuff groups of the like minded knowing the group who'd asked me to join wouldn't have to deal with posts by little me as they'd never see them.
It had a rapid take off but by around 2014 a good number of games had left and it was a poor third to Facebook and Tumblr.
This had lead to a redesign as a more pininterest like Communities push with people making community groups and joining and I made one on the original more groan up account but noticed even that started to lag when came to participation.
An API security breach affecting 500,000 users potentially in March this year lead to a review and sober heads decided it wasn't worth throwing a lot of resource at it trying to prevent this for the low usage.
In so far as my blog(s) go I'll put posts on each to cover, they are covered by RSS, Tumblr and certain sites to encourage people to bookmark/follow as that fulfils much of the function of posting blog links on a per week basis.
I haven't used it to post anything much for a good year or so so in some respects I had come to expect this decision but as it was a part of the path of my littlespace  I do feel a bit emotional over it.
It was after all until I joined Tumblr, my home.

Bestuff - early social media

Thanks for everyone who read and enjoyed last weeks outdoor edition of the blog not least the pictures.
This week I'm going back a bit in time to around ten years ago before some of you were online even and looking at one site I loved in the before Facebook, Instagram and Tumblr were the social media of choice.
The main reason you join any kind of social media is to form connections with others,  in other words it's the cyber equivalent of face to face networking so you need to find thinks that link you to who share things in common.
The mainly British social media of choice in the 2000's was Friends Reunited that worked though connecting you to schools, colleges, university and workplaces to others who had connections to them.
Bestuff was an international site that did things in way that soon become more the norm.

Rather than looking at where you've been, it looked at what you liked such as favourite films, foods, pets, hobbies, dating likes and so on in groups created by users which you'd mark up as likes that added into a mosaic collection of your "Bestuff".

 New Stuff, new categories were listed you you could keep up and by going through categories you could find your "Bestuff" and share it.
It was a bit like a game where you'd go around looking for and creating things you'd share.
It's a bit like Tumblr where you look for thing you like, reblog and follow each other except it was a bit less high tech and didn't have the messaging sophistication.
There was a Friends section you could add those you shared the most stuff with and a messaging board and my best buddy on there is in that screenshot, Tribble, to whom we had a keenly felt relationship between us.
It closed down after a period of graveyard languishing a few years back but part of my past includes this early social media so when I think  back to things when this blog was in its infancy, I do think of those days by the "Big Computer" on sites like that before joining Google Plus and Tumblr.
Of the two I'd say Tumblr is the busier by far and Google Plus is one of those things I file under was encouraged by a group of friends who seemed to want to leave Facebook but then decided freebees were worth more to them than better privacy and control of who you posted too and promptly left me on there as I refuse to do facebook. Actually I have two accounts but do wonder from time to time about scrapping one completely since I seldom use the other.

Memory stick musings

I'm just getting on with writing up this blog over the weekend where I have been a bit low in spoons which happens at times with me.
Over the last week or so I've  been thinking a bit about the difference in where I am now and where I was at a good eight to ten years ago which may seem only like yesterday to me given how my brain is wired but actually is a significant amount of time.
For one thing, that was the post breakdown period with me where I hit the buffers trying to play a role I had been encouraged to by a lot of so-called disability experts who today I see as people who fundamentally were trying to deny the major part disabilities play in my life and to a large extent shape by denying the impact and in effect having me do slot into their idea of what a 'successful' disabled person was supposed to be - an achiever showing academic abilities despite disabilities rather than a person who is may well be capable but with significant functioning issues that require constant support.
The other stemming from the same place was they also denied how those limitations mean in terms of mental development, I was functioning several years younger having the overview, language and mindset of a more junior child at high school and several years further on at the same point but being expected to perform at an adult level.
This simply isn't and hasn't in a number of decade hasn't occurred because however good I may be at filling in some gaps, the larger ones remain and to an extent even the fact I do fill the minor gaps leaves me the more vulnerable because people focus on that 'achievement' rather than what I cannot cope with and why I struggle making my way through adult life and situations.
Another of the things around this period was discovering networks sometimes websites sometimes hubs and it was one these that caught my eye Monday when looking through a  memory stick with more of an eye to pictures of my old monitor and its Charmmy Kitty screen saver, I spotted some screen prints done off it from a site I spent quite a bit time on.
Yahoo 360 for the youngsters, was a giant hub where lots of groups had spaces on, you could message and blog and your blogs were interactive, you had a update stream from what your friends were doing  and at the time I was looking around  littles and Tg/'sissy' groups, talking with people, exploring that side of life which I enjoyed until it shut down around July 2009.
That lead to a blog being started *cough* to collate what old posts I originally had on Yahoo 360.
That was a part of my coping mechanism back then as I have been recently explaining a little to people about bringing life back into line with what actually works for me, what meets my actual needs not least the 'little' side of me cos not wishing to sound like a record it's not so much age play as being in an actual age regressed by anyone else's standards headspace without an off button.
One difference between now that period is the likes of Facebook, Tumblr and to a point Fetlife fulfill what we had circa 2007-9 with dedicate sites being more niche affairs and in some respects for me Tumblr fills the Yahoo slot although for more dedicated needs the likes of EE, FA, DDLG World and GT cover more group and have a better focus. Imho, Tumblr if it built in proper Communities support rather than groups who squabble of tag rights and alleged misuse of could easily be a total 2017 Yahoo 360 replacement.
The other is I do feel more stronger in myself to pursue the life that makes more sense and especially to ensure I'm in those settings that respect my real needs  being prepared to engage with me on the level I'm at, helping me to do what I can for myself while while accepting my child-like vulnerabilities prepared to just step in as needed to deal with any situations I land in.
That's come about through the baby steps I took through that period exploring my needs and making appropriate connections to communities where I really belong.
For me then the 00's were where it all came together,

Tension

One contributor to how you are feeling and by extension how you may behave  under it's influence is the other things that are going on in your world and an increasing area I find is in the online world.
On social media in particular, groups fragment periodically with the segmented part starting a battle in part to justify to whoever is listening  just why they split off and to blacken the name of the very group not so long ago they were proud to be a member of.
You see people who for medical/disability based reasons unable to withstand endless negative and aggressive discourse actively pouring oil on the fires who fail to see after just saying why the don't like interaction with one group, make accusations often baseless just to enjoy watching the fireworks.
I find this not just troubling from how it has left certain communities feeling just interacting with anyone is just like walking on eggshells but also I find it spills over into me feeling disheartened about being the age regressed person I am and times seeping into feeling on edge with people.
That's one reason sometimes I limit the amount of time I'm on and make a point of doing things more positive like reading an uplifting story instead.