Nature has always held a fascination for me, not least in my childhood being surrounded by countryside.
It isn't just flowers that interest me, even leaf structures do too.
Friday, August 26, 2016
Nature Summer 2016
As we enter the August bank holiday, I thought I'd like to take look back to the Summer when I was I was away and I saw this group of trees.
It just appealed to me greatly so grabbed my camera and took this picture in the early morning of it while other folks were doing other things like getting up.
Nature has always held a fascination for me, not least in my childhood being surrounded by countryside.
Nature has always held a fascination for me, not least in my childhood being surrounded by countryside.
Thursday, August 25, 2016
Emotions
One of the great things about the Disney movie Inside Out was how it showed the emotions Riley experienced clearly and how that impacted on her attitude and behaviour clearly identifying them
Identifying our emotions is actually quite hard for some of us which does lead into other problem areas such as being able to tell people how we feel and also regulate them as it's as if you have two states, full on or squashed.
*Picture source vox.com
Actually although this chart was done for the movie, it is surprisingly helpful for those of who have these problems because you can easily tell where the overlapping of base emotions lead as they are clearly labelled so you can better thing through for yourself what you're feeling and communicate it to significant people in your life so they understand what you're feeling being better able to guide you managing the resulting emotions and behaviour you exhibit.
Learning to manage them is important.
Identifying our emotions is actually quite hard for some of us which does lead into other problem areas such as being able to tell people how we feel and also regulate them as it's as if you have two states, full on or squashed.
Actually although this chart was done for the movie, it is surprisingly helpful for those of who have these problems because you can easily tell where the overlapping of base emotions lead as they are clearly labelled so you can better thing through for yourself what you're feeling and communicate it to significant people in your life so they understand what you're feeling being better able to guide you managing the resulting emotions and behaviour you exhibit.
Learning to manage them is important.
Monday, August 15, 2016
Letter writing weekend
It brought a smile upon my face!
Another great story was the kid aged 14 who was in an electrified wheelchair who writing his Geography homework about Japan wrote of his extensive trips and personal knowledge that he sure couldn't of had although Ronnie was a gas to be with. He'd been clearly caught out plagiarizing a book from the library as there was no way he'd of gotten the bottom of the seabed!!!
As my Papa knows whatever my failings are I'm never that dishonest as hard going as studying can be for me like this weekend where I was working on understanding the types of writing, the typical format and structure of each and the style and tone doing exercises in rewriting from supplied information letters and articles in all five of them.
That's to develop competence and confidence in using them in everyday settings to help me do more for myself and my BFF, Lucy, support each other in our studying in addition to generally getting our lives together.
After that I listened to some music to relax and chatted cos too much studying and no fun isn't any good for me as much as having to settle down and do some structured activity is.
Friday, August 12, 2016
Thoughts on the week
My BFF, Lucy, is at her age play parents now, working part time and studying the reminder in a very child-like home setting with strict rules which are enforced.
We keep in touch a lot supporting each other as both have similar so-called real life needs to which we're getting similar support.
She wrote a Treetops story, yesterday, about a regressive school that uses traditional structures and discipline to help those of us who struggle getting life together and to be more grown up and was trying to email me without any success.
It seems I 'd allowed my mails inbox to become so full it was sending any incoming mail back to sender which is just typical as I fall down on tasks like that so I had to apologize for that.
As well, I had some fun the other night in littles chat and one area is that I have a set "No later than" bedtime which is monitored within my relationship to PB so it's necessary to excuse myself around a suitable time and that if I'm tired then in real time then in effect I'm sent to bed early which is about ensuing I get the sleep I need and I make responsible choices when I'm unwell putting my well-being first. This is something that hasn't been the case in recent past at all as I've had very much a "cannot be missing out" impulsiveness to drive myself beyond my real limits just for my fun and possibly others.
I'm actually glad I can just come out to them and be straight around why I leave when I do rather than making anything up.
Something else however I did decide not to mention there was a mutual friend of mine and a number of the others had contacted me around one uniform I had worn and also about about spanking me which is something that is a part of my relationship to them having spoken to them about my needs and how they are met such as having a Caregiver figure in my life who does using spanking with rewards and guidance to meet them.
It may seem odd to be able to talk freely to someone about what you are comfortable about what you're being spanked for and how they might do it but to me it's just a everyday part of life that's not connected with anything really adult such as sex or say bondage and has rather more in common with talking with other children or say a grown up your stopping with who says "What happens to you if you do this" say break a vase or "How are you disciplined at home?" to which you are expected to answer straightaway and truthfully.
That's hardly surprising as in my middle/little form it is just a run on of those exact same situations and I am very glad they are as parent-like figures in my life giving me the guidance and, when they feel it's appropriate, the spanking I need to help me in being accountable and learning to do more in the home.
We keep in touch a lot supporting each other as both have similar so-called real life needs to which we're getting similar support.
She wrote a Treetops story, yesterday, about a regressive school that uses traditional structures and discipline to help those of us who struggle getting life together and to be more grown up and was trying to email me without any success.
It seems I 'd allowed my mails inbox to become so full it was sending any incoming mail back to sender which is just typical as I fall down on tasks like that so I had to apologize for that.
As well, I had some fun the other night in littles chat and one area is that I have a set "No later than" bedtime which is monitored within my relationship to PB so it's necessary to excuse myself around a suitable time and that if I'm tired then in real time then in effect I'm sent to bed early which is about ensuing I get the sleep I need and I make responsible choices when I'm unwell putting my well-being first. This is something that hasn't been the case in recent past at all as I've had very much a "cannot be missing out" impulsiveness to drive myself beyond my real limits just for my fun and possibly others.
I'm actually glad I can just come out to them and be straight around why I leave when I do rather than making anything up.
Something else however I did decide not to mention there was a mutual friend of mine and a number of the others had contacted me around one uniform I had worn and also about about spanking me which is something that is a part of my relationship to them having spoken to them about my needs and how they are met such as having a Caregiver figure in my life who does using spanking with rewards and guidance to meet them.
It may seem odd to be able to talk freely to someone about what you are comfortable about what you're being spanked for and how they might do it but to me it's just a everyday part of life that's not connected with anything really adult such as sex or say bondage and has rather more in common with talking with other children or say a grown up your stopping with who says "What happens to you if you do this" say break a vase or "How are you disciplined at home?" to which you are expected to answer straightaway and truthfully.
That's hardly surprising as in my middle/little form it is just a run on of those exact same situations and I am very glad they are as parent-like figures in my life giving me the guidance and, when they feel it's appropriate, the spanking I need to help me in being accountable and learning to do more in the home.
Monday, August 8, 2016
Summer LG Camp extras
My main blog entry Summer LG Camp 2016 covers the major account of my six days including Summer 2016 LG Camp that I attended such as activities that I was involved in and so on but this is more the reflections on the experience as I experienced it emotionally.
As an adult little girl who is more on the Middle side for me this whole thing is rather like the Caregiver/little side of things in that it is a space to allow the child-like me out to play and interact as if I was an actual child at a emotional age appropriate level for me, the one impacted significantly by my developmental/learning disabilities that in so many ways I function ordinarary and with no choice at that level.
It's hardly age-play, I mean I didn't choose it, it just the hand I was given and it's a matter of learning to make the most of the only life I have.
I have been interested as much as I'm more around upper UK juniors and first year senior side about things more associated with younger children as for example I've always been drive to spin or rattle things such as whizzing tape reels around or enjoying the sound of winding a cassette back with a pencil or impulsively leaping to a rattle.
While I was away a "Baby Gym" with a pretty patterned mat and mobiles that made noises had been set out and I though, "Right, it's a quiet area" and decided to have a bit of a play with it.
It only took a few minutes and I sensed myself shifting to a younger more tactile headspace playing with it so while I may not identify with AB, some things from it could be in my little space needs that benefit from being met.
The other large side to this that for this whole period I am in a setting where my behaviour and attitudes are under the gaze of adults with authority over me and where I know I will be taken to one side and spanked without exception for any breaches of what I know isn't acceptable.
I do tend to ignore no's blanking them out or get into oppositional behaviour because my emotional side is running at a child's and not even necessary a maturing teen level and spanking is part of the way I'm being managed to put a stop to this to help me mature within my limitations in the way I generally wasn't before.
In that way I'm in the middle/little headspace where Authority has the final say and I am slowly learning, changing my behaviour so much so that I didn't need a spanking just doing what I am expected or am told to do with no back chat.
Connected with that is that they are challenging my low expectations of not just what I can do but of what it is I am to be expected to do from now on to help me grow up a little, taken on a bit more personal responsibility and contribute more to.
In this way they're putting me through growing pains and strict discipline to move me from where I had been parked.
Some of this showed for example in the Games morning where in the past I'd of not taken part in things that I both find difficult with my physical as well as developmental/learning disabilities such as being rubbish at archery, not understanding instructions well, poor co-ordination and lack of strength I'd of gone down the route of oppositional behaviour but I was informed I was to bring my games kit, put it on and be in a team regardless.
In other words I was to adopt a more grown up mature approach which would be overseen to help me with them ensuring I co-operated.
I am so thankful as hard going doing this is, they're putting me through it because I need help to change and be the best I can, not the least I can get away with.
As an adult little girl who is more on the Middle side for me this whole thing is rather like the Caregiver/little side of things in that it is a space to allow the child-like me out to play and interact as if I was an actual child at a emotional age appropriate level for me, the one impacted significantly by my developmental/learning disabilities that in so many ways I function ordinarary and with no choice at that level.
It's hardly age-play, I mean I didn't choose it, it just the hand I was given and it's a matter of learning to make the most of the only life I have.
I have been interested as much as I'm more around upper UK juniors and first year senior side about things more associated with younger children as for example I've always been drive to spin or rattle things such as whizzing tape reels around or enjoying the sound of winding a cassette back with a pencil or impulsively leaping to a rattle.
While I was away a "Baby Gym" with a pretty patterned mat and mobiles that made noises had been set out and I though, "Right, it's a quiet area" and decided to have a bit of a play with it.
It only took a few minutes and I sensed myself shifting to a younger more tactile headspace playing with it so while I may not identify with AB, some things from it could be in my little space needs that benefit from being met.
The other large side to this that for this whole period I am in a setting where my behaviour and attitudes are under the gaze of adults with authority over me and where I know I will be taken to one side and spanked without exception for any breaches of what I know isn't acceptable.
I do tend to ignore no's blanking them out or get into oppositional behaviour because my emotional side is running at a child's and not even necessary a maturing teen level and spanking is part of the way I'm being managed to put a stop to this to help me mature within my limitations in the way I generally wasn't before.
In that way I'm in the middle/little headspace where Authority has the final say and I am slowly learning, changing my behaviour so much so that I didn't need a spanking just doing what I am expected or am told to do with no back chat.
Connected with that is that they are challenging my low expectations of not just what I can do but of what it is I am to be expected to do from now on to help me grow up a little, taken on a bit more personal responsibility and contribute more to.
In this way they're putting me through growing pains and strict discipline to move me from where I had been parked.
Some of this showed for example in the Games morning where in the past I'd of not taken part in things that I both find difficult with my physical as well as developmental/learning disabilities such as being rubbish at archery, not understanding instructions well, poor co-ordination and lack of strength I'd of gone down the route of oppositional behaviour but I was informed I was to bring my games kit, put it on and be in a team regardless.
In other words I was to adopt a more grown up mature approach which would be overseen to help me with them ensuring I co-operated.
I am so thankful as hard going doing this is, they're putting me through it because I need help to change and be the best I can, not the least I can get away with.
Monday, August 1, 2016
"We interupt this blog with a Newsflash"
Not the why are we waiting edition but if you hadn't spotted I'm actually away which makes blogging more difficult as I can't go and place five links at various places and many people rely on social media for updates than tried and true systems like RSS and even 'Following'.
There are classes laid on during this period I'll be attending where I'll be doing some work -ones a bit vague but two are arts and crafts based which apart from being fun to do, putting me in a class really takes me into little space, feeling I'm back in school.
One difference from being in school in my day was we didn't have a half of the technology today's schoolboys and girls had not least that you have at hand as it were and some of issues associated with it. We passed notes and made paper airplanes in class.
Do you think I'll whip out my cellphone starting going through texts and missed calls when we're meant to be working?
I rather suspect if I did it would be dealt with cos apart from distracting others, disrespecting those who take time out to take the classes, it doesn't help me to learn to concentrate on the task in hand as I'm easily distracted.
Rules do have a purpose.
There are classes laid on during this period I'll be attending where I'll be doing some work -ones a bit vague but two are arts and crafts based which apart from being fun to do, putting me in a class really takes me into little space, feeling I'm back in school.
One difference from being in school in my day was we didn't have a half of the technology today's schoolboys and girls had not least that you have at hand as it were and some of issues associated with it. We passed notes and made paper airplanes in class.
Do you think I'll whip out my cellphone starting going through texts and missed calls when we're meant to be working?
I rather suspect if I did it would be dealt with cos apart from distracting others, disrespecting those who take time out to take the classes, it doesn't help me to learn to concentrate on the task in hand as I'm easily distracted.
Rules do have a purpose.
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