Age regression

What does age regression mean to you?
It’s not a phrase I use simply because my Middles with a little side flows from my inner child in real time less than the notion of say taking on a pre-defined role with an script, running more with actual child within emotional responses and  needs as it happens in real time. It’s more space for my Middle with little side to express herself with the ‘play’ being the setting where she comes out.
It also is the case with developmental disabilities and brain damage, even at school, not least high school, I was considerably younger than my years which left me out of sync from my mid teens onward with most of my peers although I could share in say a love of music and some movies at least but with a lot their more grown up interests and sexual references going completely over my head, like they’d be talking about making out and I’d be more interested in having a teddy bears picnic or a tween sleepover.
For me those situations either on line or in playmeets  with some of my friends over here are very therapeutic to me because they’re where I can really let that side of me out without the fear of people poking fun although the community where I live are very tolerant of my child-like ways and being know to have “special needs” does run  to my advantage in that way, allowing a greater degree of self expression than I’d of imagined after leaving high school.
How do you express you inner-kid: online? offline as part of your everyday life?
Online is fun as I am very childlike, cracking lame jokes, getting super excited but thankfully most people are at least tolerant of my childlike ways although I make serious posts on non IK sites but am very open at sites like DDLG World or Girltalk.to.forums about my little side sometimes really regressing in say a IK chat room
In what we call Real Life, as will be apparent later on, my 'big’ and I express ourselves pretty much the same, which can be fun  cos I just can’t help being myself as I use child-like phrases and words instinctively, often have plaything with me (my last works colleagues 'got it’ and were super understanding of me being very much a child to the point of buying childrens gifts at Christmas),  do dress in a more child-like way, often have cute plushies around, and easily move into little/middle headspace when I’m out, playing with thing.
My IK really comes out at Adult Little Girl meets and sleepovers, it’s just like boarding school which I loved having been to one and I’m always dressed as Middle in either playwear or English school uniform which fits me perfectly.
How do you view your innerkid? As an integrated part of you? As being totally separate? .. or maybe you don’t feel you have an innerkid per say just feel littler.
The answer to this is simple  which is to say I don’t have much of adult sense of self through the real world impact of learning, development and intellectual disabilities to the point much of the adult world is beyond my personal comprehension, having no interest or need to. Basically I’m a child with a big age number living more like a child apart from paying taxes and that.
What about discipline? Does it feature in your ageplay needs and to what extent?
I struggle with things around getting things done on time, do put off important things for more fun in the moment activities, badly need structure and am capable of being disrespectful of others because I get more into what I want then and there without considering them. As well, I don’t always judge situations well and my abilities especially in  emotionally stressful situations to keep up with and process verbal reasoning can get so poor that it just ends up jumbled up with me getting more and more frustrated with that person.  Grown up approaches to disciplining me simply aren’t effective because they just can’t go in.
What works better with me is having clear cut rules and rigid boundaries around what I’m expected to do and clear consequences which is what my mentor/caretaker has been working on with me since just before Christmas. The main focus is around working on bring more permanent changes in my behaviour and attitudes rather than just the use of discipline through talking about situations and one on one guidance.
Discipline forms an important part within the maintenance of those rules though, flowing very much as the consequence delivered for breaching them in the way as a child  it would and so my mentor/caretaker does use corporal punishment with me as so an increasing number of trusted 'grown ups’ when I’m in IK situations involving them with permission and appropriate discreteness, often when I’m dressed more as a child too.

I find being disciplined less stressful than wordy verbal scolding, feeling very calm over a knee while it also certainly has helped together with the guidance and love of others in improving my attitudes and behaviour no end. My parents have little idea what this is about but they’re really impressed by how much I’ve improved.
The aftercare is really good and I find afterward its like I’ve been 'reset’, centred anew with no past offences hanging over me although it does hurt.

Junior caning past

It always seemed to me that one of things that marked out becoming a Junior was the attitude taken to how having committed some infraction or other you were treated.by parents and especially your school.
In the past although it would it would of been something more like a scolding, smacked hands and possibly having to miss recess but because we were now Juniors, we were expected to think more about what we did and because we were older we were to be went straightway to our head teacher where as before the class teacher handled it.
I have many disabilities, some it had to be said weren't identified until after I left the education system but my physical and aspects of my developmental ones were known while in a mainstream  school and for me therefore it was no different.
I was a bit more prone to acting on impulse compared to some of my classmates but not especially naughty but could act up not least when I was meant to be doing something I found hard going or I felt people were ignoring me on purpose.
The Headteacher was at least compared to some other kids I knew was actually lovely man who did care about us, often inquiring casually how we were about our lives outside of formal lessons and did heaps to help us but he did believe strongly in classroom discipline.
You could talk with a teacher but never tell them what to do or demand your terms and they wanted you to try, then you were expected to do your best, making any changes later if they felt it wasn't working. And I was prone to trying to demand things or over-reacting so my teacher would send me to his office for a lecture often with a suppressed snigger from some in the class.
That was the point when as the expression goes, the kid gloves came off as he'd lecture me, simplifying his points, before pulling out his cane at which point I gasped as it sank in something unpleasant was going to happen.
Noticing my expression and being ready to go into a 'But-but-but Mister' appeal he explained what was to happen to me HAD to be the same as the others in the class and although he loved me, my being disabled was NOT an excuse to be treated different and more to the point he refused to treat me any different and so with that, he put me over the desk.
This was point my pants came down and my main Adult Authority figure gave me six strokes of the best before hugging me and sending me in tears back to the class.
It didn't happen very often afterward but whenever I acted up up to my last Junior term, I'd end up being sent to him although it didn't effect our relationship as I understood he trying to help me behave and rightly he needed to treat me the same as the others.
Indeed up until his death we had a great relationship having kept in touch since leaving his school and his own retirement.
I have him to than for not only keeping order in our school that helped me learn but also for demonstrating discipline wasn't a bad thing and it comes out of love.

Playwear

I think there's three types of clothes you have as a middle, your school clothes being one which I have  written bits about here already and your more going out formalish stuff that might include say party dresses or best stuff for visiting friends and relatives.
There's the other sort I haven't said much about now which is more the clothes you play in at home or say your garden (if it's secluded) where what are wanting is things that are quick and easy to wash and off you the most freedom of movement for when you are.
For me something akin to loose t shirt, a PE or in this pictures instance a Tennis skirt, ankle socks and canvas pumps is ideal although you could substitute PE shorts or short tails over the t shirt. That to me is comfortable and probably why the first set of girls attire I bought was a PE uniform to play and generally chill out in.

Order and attire

Uniform plays a part in my life because it is linked in the wider meaning of discipline, the setting and maintenance of standards including that of how you present yourself, the meaning of been seen as representing an institution to which anything you do reflects upon.
Although politically and when it comes to sexuality and gender issues I'm more liberal I am in certain respects very much conservative believing in the adherence to traditional social standards that everyone is expect to know and follow with clear sanctions.

Carefree

Really it is that carefree girl that needs to come out, the one that just runs and skips contentedly in her own little world overseen as needed feeling safe, secure and loved.
The way I see things is that's all a part of my recovering from the events of the last two years or so and understanding how it all went wrong so it can be put right.

Acceptance of control as an adult but child

The world and us can be different and what some of us are looking for is really a cross between old school authoritarian parenting and benevolent mistress to set the direction for us rather than trying to figure a way by ourselves.

We are desiring a instilling of your ideas and moulding to help us be the best us we can given we're clueless about how we see the world and the world sees us.

I'd like that person to work on getting me to presenting in more overly feminine ways bringing out the frills to go with dollies I can be playing more with rather than getting super obsessed with the groan up world and super anxious

Because I am not an adult developmentally  I need a adult parental character in charge to keep me on track and provide the no-nonsense discipline I need in my life which is why they keep the tools at hand to help me behave myself.