Easter Monday Edition

It was August Bank Holiday as I write this so this edition is going to be about a number of things that kind of connect.

The first thing is I am continuing with my study which isn't by any means easy having just done a English practice exercise based on an extract from "The Sea Raiders" by H G Wells who I suspect writes above my innate comprehension level. The fact this is supposed to be set for 11 to 14 year olds may give you an insight into just how real my problems actually are and why it's progress that I'm sat at  desk in uniform doing this not throwing it back at you!

I've got a whole Math unit revision  to complete too based on all the work I've done so far this year before moving on Shapes which just to ensure I have a hope in heck of having gotten the foundations to get right.

The other thing is although we don't talk about as much as at one time we did when things really started coming to a head the reintroduction of traditional corporal punishment has made a very real difference to my attitudes and behaviour over the years ass I have built up a powerful connection between cause and effect, with "zolts" going i my mind as to what happens BEFORE I get into that oppositional habit so I THINK before I ACT.

Things today while not perfect do run better for all that so I'm grateful for it and indeed to mark sure I start this term with a much better attitude I have been given a reminder caning on the bare with obvious weals that hurt to remind me.

 

The one thing we know from nine and a half years ago is it really works on me.

May study weekend

I don't actually know where to put myself today as the weekends events have left me feeling very different about me (and some of this will go elsewhere), what I can do and really about my life so far in.

As well all know, the one big difference this year with the exception of days when I am truly too unwell to work or away on meets such as Camp, my weekends  are taken up with something deliberately challenging.

Two days of concentrated study where I pretty much have to work on just that, sat at a desk, in uniform with no distractions working from the study guides with just fixed recess periods with no dawdling, back chat or refusing to start being accepted.

Really.

This weekend has seen me work on my English looking at how people who write stories try to draw you into the character, getting you to think you were involved and learning how to compare and contrast different texts on the same subject by style, language, use of humour and summarize any differences effectively.

I had set questions to answer on it and I managed 90%.

Concentration is my main thing, I'm awful at it, often leap frogging from task to task often more around what I find interesting rather than what needs to be done and thinking about how  might get the thing finished.

Some days tend to be better compared to others but that's one of my problems apart from just forgetting tons and tons of things within minutes of been told that.

Perhaps getting back to more of this straightaway rather than leaving it a day or so and plenty of practise at making my own strategies for getting stuff done would help a lot more?

Disability and getting on

How different people handle changed especially life changing conditions or disabilities has always interested me not least for possessing several and having known a good number of people in a variety of situations who have too.

 

It's often interesting to see how people who on the face of may have similar conditions have made of their lives, how they may differ and how others are quite different although I'd like to stress from the get go I don't feel a 'my disability is worse or better than yours' take is really helpful not least for only you alone know how that affects your life or 'mine is more or less “real” than yours either for the same reason.

 

This being said it is my personal conviction how much you are able to make of your life even though you have disabilities depends very much on not only what opportunities may be available to you (and certainly there can be a lack of them that does our society no great favours) and what our own attitudes toward making the most of our lives can be when they are.

 

This can be more difficult when it comes to dealing with things such as social anxiety which as someone does find things like meeting people or using the telephone difficult I readily understand but unless we are prepared to explore how we may get more confident or better able to communicate, then our opportunities are limited.

 

I think it's that which sometimes is the harder thing because on top everything there is insecurity and a blanket feeling that you are not being understood.

 

There is though I feel a difference between an understanding that says “I am prepared to try to improve on the things I struggle with however hard that might be” and one that simply isn't prepared to even explore what options may be available even if they may not be a “total cure” because you may be limiting yourself from the experiences and opportunities that would enrich your life. You can't advance by staying still.

 

It's hardly fair on the face of it but those of us who have disabilities who in some way or other wish to make the most of our lives in mainstream society need to do as much as can for ourselves to find ways of maximizing it, perhaps in some respects even more than those who don't face the same challenges. 

 

Things just don't come easy to us although I'd also add trying to compensate by excusing other things like 'fitting in' and following the accepted social conventions and rules as everyone else can of itself set you back simply because we have to 'hold our own' and isn't fair to everyone else even though I do recognize that's something I have been guilty of in the past.

Pay attention Jo (yet another study weekend)

This was typed between bit of spare time this weekend where it was bright and sunny although not exactly warm here not that it stops his Gingerness from being out for hours at a time.

"Cheer up, Girls, it can't surely be that bad" is the thought that enters my mind looking at that picture and the desks we sat at one by one until my secondary education were similar for those of us brought up with rote learning and the notion the teacher delivering the lesson to the class.
This weekend I've been studying  with an English practice on an extract from Oscar Wilde's The Picture  of Dorian Gray which was more about how to answer questions long answers where there is not a clue in the question as the what in the extract you need to look at and where necessary quote from.
Not wishing to sound like I'm on repeat, but my reading age is barely in double digits so reading it for the gest of the story was very hard going but I managed 90% in this.
The other part of the study is my favourite subject  -NOT- Math looking at working out Areas, Circumferences, Diameters and Radius using formulas for squares, circles, rectangles and triangles (right angled and others) in addition to learning about Solids and Nets which involves having to use ordinary math.
Although part of the formula wasn't properly explained so I had to work it out for myself, I did actually get 100% on this unit which is pretty amazing.
I'd like to thank Papa Bear for his supporting me, he's a lovely, firm but fair guy who believes in me probably more I've done in the  past to be honest and everyone else who does helping me grow.

Final January study weekend

If you looked around of Friday and nothing seemed to have changed, that's okay cos I didn't make a optional late week entry.

Anyway, this Saturday saw me working at English looking at different styles of writing, formal and informal, the sort of language, sentence structure and introductions, concluding paragraphs and the way you sign letters.
Writing I learned can be about many things thing, such as stories, essays, informing, explaining ,advising and persuading people by argument and how each has their own needs to be effective.
As well, I learned about the importance of planning what you write, setting the topic, the points or when it comes to stories, the plot, seeing it through to a conclusion that leads to the reader understanding fully what you were saying.
It's very tempting to just plow on with an idea very much as it comes to you without really making sure at the end you've fully covered everything that's relevant to it and while it's possible in the age of the text writing program to change things, it's still more time consuming to rework everything compared to just setting down and making a plan.
Structuring matters especially to ending a piece of writing, which has never been my strong point as while I did lean how to write a decent business letter at college a good number of years back, everything we did was very business orientated including how to compose telegrams.
The other area of English I did was around Reading, looking at descriptions and how authors compare and contrast characters answering questions on extracts including quoting to back up the points in my answers.
I got 100% in one test and 70% in the second, which for someone with my disabilities is pretty good going.
On Sunday because I'm better now, I had math work to get on with such as looking at using and calculating Ratios, working out Units and Money (the making sense of that I really struggle with in shops).
That sort of thing can help if you're trying to figure what's the best offer in the shops, what the total cost of things are and how much change should have cos as embarrassing as it is it's all stuff that adds to the other aspects of being out, shopping emotionally that soon takes me into very negative oppositional behaviour.
In addition I have Long Multiplication and Division to work at which I struggle with, being warned of consequences if I flat out refuse to try get to grips with them cos I'm like that at times.
I did the tests on this and I got them all right just using paw, pencil and paper.
My BFF suggested trying a Times Table cd to help me learn my Times Tables as I struggle with them so I got one, copied it and it lives on a portable player so I can both learn and keep them them fresh in my head.
Knowing my times tables helped me especially with long division  which I think was the big problem at school - taking to take me to more advanced work without really grasping the basic things - so I just dug my heels in.
Thanks to everyone not least my BFF for supporting me checking in across the two days.
Lucy, you're a star!

Weekend studying

Another weekend goes and can you imagine what I've been doing over two days in this cold and snowy time?

 Yes, I had double studying this weekend where I actually had just sit down and work my grey socks off rather than either being distracted by other stuff online or otherwise and actual get started on time as I have from now on...
Is that an offstage Ow you hear? (lol).
So on Saturday in English I was working on backing up points by using quotations and getting to grips with making sense of Shakespeare, being able to read extracts from plays and make out what really is happening to the point of being able to show I understood  what I had read.
Shakespeare isn't like me  just coming out with it even with a bit of diplomatic license, it's often wrapped around long poetic descriptions and anything but direct.
I did manage to get every question right this week as well as drawing neat boxes to make the tables to put some of the answers in.
During the week the Ks 3 Math study and workbook arrived which could mean one thing, that like it or not I had Math to work on  and was required to get myself a Geometry set and traditional exercise book to write my work in on Friday when it had been snowing.
Can you imagine it, a increasing number of exercise books with "Joanne, [Subject] Month/Year and Form: 1EB" written neatly on the front that I am to fill out over the year?
Sunday I had to tackle Math starting on what you'd call basic number work such as how you put numbers in order to express them as Math and in English as well as size before moving on addition, subtraction, multiplication and division featuring patterns, multiplying and dividing  in decimal units which cause my fears to multiply(!) as well how to multiply and divide numbers like 20, 300, 800 which I can't recall being shown not that being truthful I'd of paid that much attention to back in the day.
I'm also working through Multiples, Factors and odd, even, squared and cubed numbers too and it's all starting sink in as although this is hard for me, I did actually manage it, even going back over one calculation three times until I spotted where I was going wrong which was very good for me as I'd of thrown the pencil at you cursing until very recently.
In a way it really underscores where the work on my attitudes and behaviour slots in because it's not that this isn't hard  for me but it is something with support I can grasp but didn't want saying in effect "Too hard, why even try" which is why a very strict line has and is taken with me.
It actually shows that with a no-nonsense approach when it's coupled with support and guidance I am able to do things, that I have abilities I can use and from now on I'm to put a real effort into trying. 

I CAN DO MORE WITH THE RIGHT HELP WHEN I ALLOW OTHERS TO HELP ME
That is what being a responsible disabled adult middle is all about

Also my BFF checked in during the days to see how I was getting on, like actually getting started and I did the same for her which does seem to work well for both of us and she did well too.

Numbers

The weekends interlude of snow has passed so I wobble around our estate without fallin' down today which is nice as I don't like being shut in much at all.
Talking in various places across the week brought a few memories back about the past like how we were taught math.

 For us everything started with learning addition and subtraction (take aways) and the decimal system (yay for logical units!) before being introduced to times tables which we had to learn by rote, reciting both individually and as class  up to the Twelve timestable and also by compiling our own time tables  in a grid form.
Everything came from either a text book or more often what our class teacher stuck up on the board for us to either copy down in our exercise books and complete or to work through in class on the board with us being called out to complete in front of the class  showing your working out.
There weren't any work sheets, calculators or a computer back then.
Carrying over numbers and doing long division are kinda etched in my brain which says a lot about how effective the whole class teaching was despite my best effects of telling the teacher I didn't think I should have to, which responded in a sharp reminder who was actually in charge.
We did do fractions but by the time I went to boarding school we got more into equations, area and trigonometry  which I was lousy at to be honest.