Weekend studying

Another weekend goes and can you imagine what I've been doing over two days in this cold and snowy time?

 Yes, I had double studying this weekend where I actually had just sit down and work my grey socks off rather than either being distracted by other stuff online or otherwise and actual get started on time as I have from now on...
Is that an offstage Ow you hear? (lol).
So on Saturday in English I was working on backing up points by using quotations and getting to grips with making sense of Shakespeare, being able to read extracts from plays and make out what really is happening to the point of being able to show I understood  what I had read.
Shakespeare isn't like me  just coming out with it even with a bit of diplomatic license, it's often wrapped around long poetic descriptions and anything but direct.
I did manage to get every question right this week as well as drawing neat boxes to make the tables to put some of the answers in.
During the week the Ks 3 Math study and workbook arrived which could mean one thing, that like it or not I had Math to work on  and was required to get myself a Geometry set and traditional exercise book to write my work in on Friday when it had been snowing.
Can you imagine it, a increasing number of exercise books with "Joanne, [Subject] Month/Year and Form: 1EB" written neatly on the front that I am to fill out over the year?
Sunday I had to tackle Math starting on what you'd call basic number work such as how you put numbers in order to express them as Math and in English as well as size before moving on addition, subtraction, multiplication and division featuring patterns, multiplying and dividing  in decimal units which cause my fears to multiply(!) as well how to multiply and divide numbers like 20, 300, 800 which I can't recall being shown not that being truthful I'd of paid that much attention to back in the day.
I'm also working through Multiples, Factors and odd, even, squared and cubed numbers too and it's all starting sink in as although this is hard for me, I did actually manage it, even going back over one calculation three times until I spotted where I was going wrong which was very good for me as I'd of thrown the pencil at you cursing until very recently.
In a way it really underscores where the work on my attitudes and behaviour slots in because it's not that this isn't hard  for me but it is something with support I can grasp but didn't want saying in effect "Too hard, why even try" which is why a very strict line has and is taken with me.
It actually shows that with a no-nonsense approach when it's coupled with support and guidance I am able to do things, that I have abilities I can use and from now on I'm to put a real effort into trying. 

I CAN DO MORE WITH THE RIGHT HELP WHEN I ALLOW OTHERS TO HELP ME
That is what being a responsible disabled adult middle is all about

Also my BFF checked in during the days to see how I was getting on, like actually getting started and I did the same for her which does seem to work well for both of us and she did well too.

Disgraced Jo gets it

 

The week had began most promising with both having a  pleasant day with Dad who I have issues with for like ages working something out that enabled us to share a bit of time together as well as helping Mom out more while she’d been poorly but ended up some other place, despite rather than because all of that.

To begin with I had been given some homework by Sir that I had actually done on time and spend quite a bit of thought over before writing quite a lot  which is really around me, discipline and our relationship when it comes to it.

But there was a question I had to answer in this and it was if there was an infraction I needed to own up to? Well I could not lie to him whose presence in my life has made such a difference so I had to tell him the truth and the whole truth at that.

I had been asked a few times to clear up my space which had gotten over run by used jiffy bags, boxes and so on to the point you couldn’t get to clean around it and you’d need to be agile to get around of it  on your legs without walking on something or other.

Well, it wasn’t long before I got the message all right as I was due for a “Sound Spanking” which wasn’t an expression I was that familiar with but then you, dear reader probably think I should of  been before all this.

Then I was ordered to drop my knickers right down and spanked both with slipper and after a short pause again by the wooden hair brush while bent over a chair rather a lot of times so by time we’d finished my bottom was extremely sore and practically on fire. I had cried toward the end and after pulling my knickers back up, stood hugging me teddy as a I rubbed my smarting bottom.

I then had to sit on hard chair in contact with my knickers for half an hour facing the corner amplifying the discomfort from the spanking to further internalize it something I’d forever associate with my actions. That was followed by something new to my punishments, hand written lines to write too, 100 of them .

It was the most painful spanking in my whole life still leaving after a few days my bottom  still painful and and would like to thank him for giving me, his little, the Sound Spanking I so badly needed to change my ways which is is going to help me do. As I explained, the lines are very much child like but did give me a sense of closure on this infraction that I find I need.

I am grateful as his little, he takes the time to understand my needs not least my need to be spanked and to use that in his mentoring approach helping our relationship and his parenting of me to and for my own good.

So begins another school day...

Another day in school before I brake up, this is quite true because  I do have things to study, research and even homework set to be done and am currently sat working on my end of term test assignment in uniform.
You might well be thinking why I might do this given in most respects I don't have to get up for anything much since the last few years when I was found not able to work with the many and overlapping disabilities I have.
The first and obvious thing to at least those who have seem me for real is the way my middle side comes out is that of a school aged girl, the age range as I mentioned a few times and not just on this blog being determined less by picking an age playing role as the all too real limits on my functioning.
Being the way I am means like with a good many actual children, school with it's routines, structures and support is something that makes me feel safe, secure even so being that person having some school work to do helps me feel comfortable with the world.
It's also the case when people set me work, they are really helping me because you're encouraging me to become more self disciplined which is something left entirely to my own devices I do struggle with because you set a task, a work level and a date to have it handed in completed by for marking.
Marking it helps not just by showing how much you value the fact I did it but also in showing me where I could do better that helps me learn how do tasks better.
So for me this whole thing is a very helpful part of my life.

Set homework?

In accepting the premise of 'doing' school based age play, one area that's likely to figure in it is the setting of homework rather like the way back in the day our actual schools did.
This usually was done to encourage you to work hard under your own sense of discipline developing in you self-discipline which to be truthful I do lack and to which on completion you'd be marked on.
I think some sort of school role play that included it would be beneficial to me.

Schoolgirl roleplaying

I'm currently engaged in a online School Roleplaying game where I play as myself in a class that has set work to produce from internet based resources and there in game and out of game rules.
It also has rules about when work should be handed in and a written punishments system outside of any verbal chastisement so as far as it is possible it has much of the emotional and psychological feel of being in school, having to work and being judged up on that so to that extent I may experience unpleasant emotions in much the same way as I did in real in real school.
I've consented to this within the game because I feel the setting of tasks and the certainty of some written punishment such as lines to complete my help train me to be more focused and that I am under disciplined which as I've talked about here was and is causing problems in my life.