Lingerie time

We're going back a few years really this week, actually just under a few decades really when I first started really exploring much of this in the online era experimenting with different looks of which one was really the maid look.

Not a cheap and cheerful pvc take but something more like actual hotel maids and that wore at the time and where just after leaving school I had rather fancied at least in my head the idea I could work as a maid as people skills and attention to detail were more me, what I was good at than much else.

Exploring lingerie started for me around the time I got a job working in the city centre where there's more of everything than here and these wore my thoughts as written down back then on this experience.

I was busy working today and had some time to kill before I left for home.

This thing has been bugging me for decades certainly past being 12 and it's why for all my gender issues and the rubbish I've endured, have I never actually gone out a.nd bought myself lingerie? 

Is it that I'm just too embarrassed to be seen looking through the displays and to be holding them at the sales counter, like if someone I know just happens to see me?

Darn it, I want to know so today I actually and deliberately walked into a high street lingerie store and with the aid of the female assistants bought myself several pretty pairs with bows on, nothing really hot, just regular pretty to wear under my slacks while I'm in vanillaville.

The funny thing was I didn't phaze the staff out and and they made me feel comfortable during the whole time.

And that really was the thing so rather go the route of chains like Transformation, I went to high end lingerie stores and let them help me pick what looked good on me

Cutesy warmer days

Wowies some interest here and at the EB even if only two out of possible twenty others from the "camp scene" did which does say it all - they just prefer gossip to showing an interest in you, in the way many of us in real life and in other forums would wish one another a happy birthday.

That shows really what's missing ever since they  regrouped using different communications.

As a kid we played all manner of games at birthday parties that if you were good, you'd be invited to apart from the party food, back then fairly simple like sticking the tail on the donkey or Blind Man's Bluff that were fun.

This was a game I remember playing that was really funny.

 

This blog has always been electric-correction-eclectic in its scope dealing with things that broadly fit into my middle/littles life and vantage point as much as it might be easier to fill each entry with plushies and the like.

It's just me in the end contemplating an Exposure Value reading while clutching Theo with a bowl of ice cream at hand.

Anyway my liking plushies and cute things has always been mentioned here, at EB and other sites before arriving on Tumblr as it goes back quite some time and even Mommy knew that.

She knew I was all sweaters and skirts and now it's spring I can enjoy wearing my shorter skirts being the kitten I am.

A message from the Plushies II

Been a bit busy tidying up this week removing magazines that soon build up and the likes and  I thought I'd post about something that is troubling me.

 One group appears to have a "one set of rules for some and another for all else" running through who can be in a private group on a popular messaging site, the way people can know about any group activities - only seeing the information WHEN you've been added to the list so you never know to even register an interest before and not even getting back to your messages.

Ideas for a back up channel if one long running LG site has issues using the same provider are just ignored without comment even though they know the old Yahoo system had ceased working a while back and there is no list on site of Moderators so if anyone has a concern they can raise directly.

 

 Time to just cuddle your plushies while this carry on continues.

Introducing Lauren

Yes it's finally here, for Christmas.

Although I don't endorse living your life as a stereotype - I sure haven't lived mine like one! - I have a classic girl fixation with dolls something that's been with me since childhood actually that in that typically confused way was 'permitted' by Mommy when many other things weren't.

I've written about a few of my dolls before but this one is special cos I found it in a store that was scheduled to close down within a few days.

She's a Vanity Fair doll coming with a certificate of authenticity that the designers called Laura but I beg to differ about that name so I went ahead and Christened her Lauren instead as I just love that name after removing all the packaging  with bubble wrap over the joints.

I like her face and hat.

Dollies is really more what girls like me need.

Return to past little life?

Sunday is in this country Fathers day and usually something reminds me on a daily basis I still have one of them so I have a card and that sorted out which has been a bit of miracle given how the heat of the last few days has affected me.

The whole situation around a certain at one time frequent event, those who are involved around it and those I'd normally see in the last eighteen or so months has been messy, emotional, obtrusive even to the point I had for practical purposes resigned myself to not going or unspoken we'd rather people more like x were around or even drip fed rumours and whispering campaigns suggestion you didn't "make the grade" even if I may of said I'd love to attend.

It appears Cinders may yet be going to the ball albeit on straw mat in small space rather than a grand pumpkin pretty much on somebody else's terms but that doesn't matter at you'll be there, less "cast out".

Something of that sort could of been sorted as one place has one room that is never used for it's purpose just a dumping ground and another is so massive you'd get something like an airbed in with tens of meters spare and indeed people have put in other kind of structures and slept in them.

You are left working just why anything like that wasn't even offered given the circumstances that led to be being dropped.

It's a pleasant surprise to be back "in".

Wednesdays musings

To be honest while the next edition of the main blog is written and ready to go, I'm actually a little behind on writing this one but there is a bit of story to that.
I was feeling a little grouchy yesterday which people at one site may of noticed, nothing big and and bad but low level but out there which may of been connected thinking about some past events plus the Daylight saving Time that over here we've just entered that messes my body clock up.
You see, I'm really more a mornings girl, off out of bed with bounce, getting things done but starting to feel run down by afternoon, happier with my earlier than most legal adults with early fixed bedtimes.
I feel sad when I see dark mornings, setting me off with the wrong sort of attitude- it's hard to explain but it really bothers me - and I think that's what kicked all that off.

 By the end of last nights littles chat I was feeling more playful and fun just in time for bed so at last I end up between the sheets next to Theodore the IInd  on a high ready for a good nights sleep.
I was talk to a person the other day about  where and what this littles/middles life slots in with me which is funny cos it's just been me being me but to me it's my natural relaxed state, laying across a bed, maybe reading clutching a teddy  surrounded by my dolls and that. Carefree.
Until next time, Jo.

Daddy's girl

Just been getting things ready to visit a adult who I'll stay with for two and a bit days which involves finding my travel stuff like my washbag and my clothes which are generally what they wish me to be in when in their company as the 'child' they look after.

 Having done quite a bit of that I'm just lying across the bed relaxing a bit before I eat and thinking about about this life of mine .
It's quite a bit different than it was several years back because in so many ways I'm  back to where I was as a competent child whose special needs are being dealt with by Daddy, who is in touch with me across each day making sure I'm alright, not feeling troubled because he cares enough to check.
My daddy talks with me most nights before sleep about the day so I have a proper bedtime routine and when he judges I am feeling tired he makes sends me to bed straight away with  with bedtimes kisses.
I have this emotional intimacy with him as his girl who he cares for in way I've never had  before trusting him to help me make decisions  and equally I show my love for him by taking an interest in his life, health and work.
I love my daddy so much I want to obey him as daddy's girl subject to his loving correction.
The one thing I know for sure is I am truly fortunate to have daddy that loves and protects me as his own.

Dress and the Adult Kid

Sometimes the question may get asked why wear clothes associated more with Girls as a Adult Girl?

To me it's not a hard and fast rule that anyone who sees themselves more as a Adult female child should have to dress like one and for a good number of us, it may get in the way of things such as workplace dress codes and so on and at times I do wish some in our (ALG) community were a bit less uptight over it. I mean it's only fabric after all.

There are a number of settings though where I do feel it's of very real benefit of which one is if you're with a Adult authority figure (male or female) in a relationship where anything like this needs to be talked through.

The other might be you do have an external authority figure or Mentor, you don't but may be meeting others possibly with some responsible adults or it's just how you see yourself.

To me the principal advantage is simply it makes you look more the Child you are because it removes the last bits of adult standing from your appearance at a distance.

You look into the mirror and you see something more like that child in it which aids you in doing those things that come natural to you as the adult child as you see nothing unchild in you.

An almost as important advantage when it comes to dealing with Adult authority figures is they see the child, their girl who looks very much it as they treat you very much like the junior you are, playing, drinking your milk and watching cartoons.

I love character t shirts like Hello Kitty ones and being in dresses and skirts which also happen to be easier when it comes to giving me my spankings in them in what is a very authentic junior experience leaving me clear just who is in control.

When it comes to underwear I like fuller briefs sometimes with cute designs on that are more like the sort you had when you were younger rather than anything that's clearly more grown up. My feeling is that's more appropriate for the adult-child you are and are being treated as.

Cute underwear

Although you'd never of sneaked this past the school rules inspections we had way back then, these Hello Kitty knickers are awfully cute and would been on my wish list at the time and just are my kind of thing even now.

Darning free zone

Hello and hope you're having a jolly good day as we move into the fall.
The great thing about the fall is the colour of the leaves changing aided by low glowing sun but there's no getting away from it, it's a little cooler than it was.
That takes me to one of the essentials of my uniform, long over the knee socks to keep my legs nice and warm.

Well, a pair of mine were getting a bit of hole in them and with my paws I can't darn them  so in replacing them I give a hit of thought what they were going to go with and these go with my school skirt as well as my black pinafore dress.
With that I got two pairs of each from Sexy Minx - not all her stuff is suitable for children - but what the heck, she's a great etailer on ebay.
Rather dash don't you think?

Elizabeth in Joanne?

This post has be coming to me this morning where I'm poorly laying across my Hello Kitty bed attire and new Duvet in my school uniform, so do bear with me.
Off and on, I've made reference to the books I read during my chronological childhood some of which I owned, some borrowed off friends or via the library of the boarding school I attended.
Indeed you may of spotted a few entries here about books by Enid Blyton that come in that category and how I've gotten new copies not least the second but last entry around St Clare's that with this rotten cold I'm reading, something that is a direct echo of my childhood in times when I read books in my dorm or the sick bay.
I recently got though a most interesting addition again an older edition with original illustrations that has taken me back with some startling observations.
With the final three in one volume of St Clare's (Back to St Clare's) was another three in one book.

This was a 1992 edition of first three The Naughtiest Girl stories (Naughtiest girl again, Naughtiest girl is a monitor and Naughtiest girl in the school)

The stories are set in Whyteleafe, a progressive co-ed boarding school that some feel has a striking resemblance to Summerhill school in Suffolk, England.
The main character is Elizabeth who you could say is a very spoilt child used to getting her own way often running with unchallenged ideas so much so she resolves to behave so badly she can't avoid being expelled from the school she never wanted to go to. The secondary character is her best friend, Joan Townsend, who tries to get her to behave which by the time Elizabeth realizes how lonesome she was as a only girl, she gets more onside with the other children and  is less of a problem to the staff.
Here's an earlier cover from one of the separate books:

Now the first think upon quickly skimming the book was I saw my reflection in in how she dressed in the original illustrations, not least the fully pleated skirt, the modern version of which I'm actually wearing. She's around nine or ten years of age so the first thing I am thinking is, *Something* around this age is lodged in me as I'm not a senior. The second  is that smile as she's doing thinks like flirting ink about - it comes to me that around this age I did some similar things with ink and it's her awkwardness is causing this lashing out as oddly enough it did for me.

E.A stood there on the left of this original illustration is the image of that era of my life, meeting together with satchel, sports kit and naturally full uniform.
One interesting aspect of the Whyteleafe school is that the children have meetings where they dole out pocket money (everyone has a certain minimum  because it is pooled and the case for more has to be accepted by the others first) and also they deal with infractions dishing out punishments which the Monitors have the power to as Elizabeth is reminded of when she acted silly.
In practise, in my school head boys and girls also did although it wasn't formally set up - effectively they stepped in and if didn't accept whatever the outcome was, it was reported to the staff.
On one  particular day I did do something really silly like get going calling one girl rotten names and it got a bit out of hand, as does some of Elizabeth's silly things but unlike it being raised at a Meeting I was called to see the Headgirl in private who wanted answers, insisted on an apology to the girl in question and used her hairbrush on me (which was as far as I was concerned better than some poxy letter from the Head to my folks who'd just send me to child welfare person dragging the whole thing out. At least it's all over with in one go.).
Like Elizabeth I got better after that as I learned to fit in better with people, having my rough edges smoothed and even became a year rep, greeting very important people which does help when as now I have to do groan up things.
Having this book has reminded me of the distance I've travelled emotionally, the difficulties I've overcome in the past through learning to be more mature in how I deal with situations. As well, it affirms what Joanne remains deep down - a little girl only just in double digits - and no one least of me should ever forget it.

Disney bedroom?

All right The television is a bit past it's sell buy date having a old style picture tube rather than a flat screen lcd one but this is a middles girls bedroom needs to be, restful with plenty of space to spread out across the bed or floor when playing or watching say a dvd with cushions, plushies and nothing really Big in there so it aids your being in little/middle headspace at night.
That's the thing as an adult middle or little can be hard to achieve, avoiding the techno stuff that takes over the space or maybe running some groan up thing from within it.

Little dresses

For me being a little does include somethings outside of a school type setting even though I'm a schoolgirl
A traditional Peter Pan collared dress to wear at things like family gatherings or more formal parties would be just the thing cos I love being in dresses. 

Although when I was officially growing up we tended not to wear tights and indeed tights had only recently taken over from stockings, I'd of been okay with wearing tights as for one thing Mommy put me in tights during the winter months.

Needs

Sometimes the thing we truly need in our lives isn’t pleasant but is necessary.

I often need someone to really take an idea in my head that's beyond my comfort zone physically and make that happen such as wearing a very cute short pleated skirrt wit cute tights and feminine blouse in order to realize the me within which was thing that for so long was repressed.

We shouldn’t be spared it if we are to become more mature, reliable people and if I need a good spanking to get it on then responsible people should make it happen.  I’d be lying if I said I didn’t need it and it is.

Tartan HK!

No, that's not my tartan although it's adorable but it's the jersey/skirt this lovely Hello Kitty plushie  made by Ty is wearing  that I recently bought. I take it  to work with me to make the groan up side of life a bit more bearable.
You have to be a bit careful with plushies as some of the cheap ones are made from reused materials like hospital waste and not treated so always check they are licensed from the people who have the rights for your favourite character in this case Sanriotown inc.

Also this week I finally school based anime Suzaka of which there is a feature on tagged Anime so just click on the topic index  on this blog to see it. (It doesn't bite you know!)

In other news,several of our group went to camp having a wonderful small time of it as they played  children's games and activities together. One day I may join them, you never know!
Doo joined the gang in chat on Tuesday  appearing to have a good time of it in that great mix of the serious and the random that usually leaves me in a fit of giggles ready to fall of off the chair.

I noticed outside of the usual traffic sources like GT and IK, a few people from Christie Luv's revamped site a paid a visit last week. If that's you by any chance then welcome to the World of Joanne_Chan, bookmark this blog which is super clean and if you wish, formally follow it!

Warm presents

Seeing it's coming close to Christmas people might be thinking about what you could get your little or middle which they'd really appreciate. I know my folks sometimes have struggled with this for a good number of years battling between what you might like and what others might think, but this super cute Hello Kitty pj footed set would just be the thing.
For one thing it's just pj's so they don't need to be seen by visitors and for another they are sufficiently cute you'd feel very cozy and comfortable in them even say lazing around first thing while the footed bit is so little you isn't it?

Girlie socks!

Through my love of the cute and my 'Little Girl' side I'm strongly drawn to these very girlie socks that aren't a million miles removed from what I'd of had on as an actual little way back when.
While at British Home Stores who have branches in most UK cities I spotted these really cute ankle socks that were on special offer are are great with trousers or mid to short length skirts.
 During the recently snowy patch I went out shopping as work had called advising not to turn in as they'd shut down.
I have issues about being out in the winter following a childhood accident and in an attempt to deal with that I gritted my teeth and went out.

Pinafore dresses

There are some aspects to being a 'Little Girl' you cannot leave behind in my experience.I can't get enough of pinafore style dresses and this one is favourite of mine. I used to wear a lot of them when I was younger and found them to really practical being able to easily mix and match to various tops I had - long or short sleeves - dependent on the time of year.
Also and crucially I find it helps in bringing my mind image of that pinafored little girl in all her boundless optimism   into a physical breathing reality even if the design as with this one is obviously more 'adult' lacking say the charcoal grey and box pleats of the standard little girl pinafore.

This is a bit more like it, mid teen look with deep pleats but with suitable black  tights on very much me but I'd have brogues or loafers rather than those shoes.
Strangely enough I was 'put into tight's' around that age by Mommy (she had so many contridictions!) so if I was being a mid teen in role play I might well opt for tights.

Animal friends

Many of us have our first exposure to animals as children.
We may be taken to see ponies, to a working farm or even a zoo - in my case we had school trips to the Zoo most years actually that we went on a charted bus on together with our sandwiches and pop.
Still more of us had our own animals such as rabbits, cats and dogs that we shared our time with and maybe it was the first taste of responsibility we had taking the dog for it's daily work, feeding the rabbit carrots or sorting out the litter try of your cat.
In fact I had all three although not at once although the dog went a bit funny in the brain department and sadly had to go.
I think our having exposure to animals is a force for good, don't you?