Christmas 2010

I'm thinking about where to take this age play middle girl stuff as I really want to talk more with anyone who may be feeling the same this next year cos it gets boring just banging out stuff on my aging computer.
One of my ideas of a great present would be to do just that and maybe meet up but in the mean time this'll do nicely

Season's greetings

It's fast approaching Christmas here where apart from reading the Nativity story we're going to busy with writing our Christmas Cards, visiting our friends and generally preparing for Christmas Day itself so we'll be taking a break here on the World of Joanne Chan  until the New Year.
Our blog is like us unapologetically Junior minded steeped in life and likes of being a Junior even if by our age we are older than our years and that is and was what we're about our child-like innocence.
So with all that we'd like to wish you a very happy Christmas and New Year.

Regressed replacements IV

I suppose if we have to, we could try to  have simpler and more wholesome music I can just sing along to, swaying in my dresses and skirts

With cuter appeal and even pets

Time for a story

Not that long the little saint nick comes, eh and I'm thinking  back to the Christmas's of the past and the presents I'd of wanted to have been given.
I loved reading although it's something I'm not even now particularly good at and so I's of gotten a  few books.

 

Now that's more the kind of book, a collection of short stories you can just dip into whenever you have a few minutes spare and as it happens I have a copy of this because although when I was a bit older and we were moving about Mommy tossed aside stuff including books she thought I grew out of, this one came with me in the toybox no doubt wrapped in wallpaper that we were expected to put over to protect our books so no one knew what it was!

The front cover makes me so happy with its carefree images of junior life although I only briefly had a dog and well you don't run around with your cat on a lead now do you?

Also back then we weren't big on 'Brands' with their logo's spluttered on garments like some walking advertising hoarding.

Warm presents

Seeing it's coming close to Christmas people might be thinking about what you could get your little or middle which they'd really appreciate. I know my folks sometimes have struggled with this for a good number of years battling between what you might like and what others might think, but this super cute Hello Kitty pj footed set would just be the thing.
For one thing it's just pj's so they don't need to be seen by visitors and for another they are sufficiently cute you'd feel very cozy and comfortable in them even say lazing around first thing while the footed bit is so little you isn't it?

Joggers Jo

In the dim and distant past before this blog was formally started some years ago I often thought about what go in it but really it's anything connected about me, how I live and present.

 You see I do have some Tomboyish traits and for a good period about five years after I left school I did enjoying wearing track suit bottoms a lot with either t shirts, sweatshirts and a baseball jacket which in that period became almost an iconic image of me.
Generally it was Puma's that I wore with matching trainers and the only trend I did resist was the whole 'popper' phase where they'd be all down the legs which didn't appear to make any sense to me.Like why would you need to unpop your legs?

Prefecture

Although at my school head boys and girls didn't have the ability to use the cane (unless they broke the rules and found the head teachers) it wasn't unknown for them to punish you and indeed my best friend was one and did spank me several times not that it wasn't done without good reason you understand.
For one thing I was prone to swearing quite a bit, sometimes writing the words on the chalkboard for good measure and even when not, if I had written them down on paper , I'd be called over and had to explain truthfully what I written and why before being put over her lap for a spanking.
It always was the case when I was at risk of developing a smoking habit I was told in no uncertain terms if she caught me with a cigarette, I would get the biggest spanking of my life from her.
The fact I never ever took up smoking says a lot about how much of an influence she was and what I have to be grateful for her  for.

Regessive replacements III

Equally replace magazines and newspapers by  something really more appropriate

Like this

Or this that also might help teach me Curtsey

Or these with traditional childhood stories and even horse adventures.

Linzi

It's been a rough ol' two weeks for me emotionally as no doubt several of you will have gathered and I'm slowly trying to get back to normal.
I don't make any apologies for posting something that takes me back to my childhood cos with events my mind has been thinking about the past, the people in them and what they meant to me.
Linzi pictured from a crummy old photo I took has been a part of my life for decades a gift from a dear friend that I treasure. I treasure both Linzi as a doll, one of several I still own, and love as much as the memory of the person who brought her into my life.
Linzi is very girlish in her lace, ribbons and nicely finished hems in a relatively unfussy way that also is a part of my own self image (it may not be the most practicable in sub zero temperatures though!) and helped me though some difficult times with childhood scrapes.
Do any of you have similar objects in your lives that hold a lot of emotions?

Getting proper started

It's strange. For most of my life - ever since I saw the lovely schoolgirls at school in their very girlish uniform - I wanted to wear a school uniform regularly. And now that I have more of the chance to do it, I don't. At least not often.  I hedge my bets dressing more like the office junior who left secretarial school for the world of work rather than actually regressing and when I do it's usually more the PE kit I put on rather than than regular day school uniform.
I have thought about this a lot lately and I think I have an explanation. I think it's because I lack the confidence to just come out as having this need, fetish, whatever you wanna call it even though I know I have it and even some who were born and raised as girls do even.
It's not that I have an issue with regression or even been seen as child-like - god knows I've acted at times in public very much like the child dressed as grown up - it's the fear of freaking at putting myself in actual girls attire not girl like attire for adults.

Back when I started all this  I was just getting over the nervous breakdown and the realization I wasn't an adult at least functionally and that pretending otherwise really had screwed me up. I was devastated (well, I'm still devastated) and maybe somehow I longed for my feminine junior schoolgirl side even more than usual. So it was great feeling to be wearing something more akin to what we did before I left school but didn't take things where they needed to be.

I think it would help a lot if I had a play partner or a dominant of some sort  who "forces" me to wear my uniform everyday not because they would be making me do anything I didn't really deep down so much as pushing me past that fear of freaking so I realize the appearence of that junior girl I am as much as is possible in my life cos that's really what is best for me.

Hair today

Things I would of loved Mommy and other female adults in my life to have done for me in childhood include plaiting and putting my hair in bows after washing it from a shoulder length.

Age regressed reading

When it came to reading although people tried to push me toward more 'grown up' works like those by George Orwell, Thomas Hardy and Jane Austin I always longed for my Junior and early Senior favourites which no doubt would fail a diversity test for being seen as white, middle class and stereotypically girlish.
Part of the reason is language, my disabilities limit my ability to read for understanding and comprehension of plots so in a way they have to be a bit younger and in an easy to grasp  formular, the other being they key in to recreated school age-play where these were about our lives sometimes set in school itself and all read in boarding school.
Enid Blyton's Naughtiest Girl series is my favourite cos in so many ways I can readily identify with it's main character, Elizabeth Allen, whose attitude are not so removed from mine.

Bonfire night edition

Seeing we are approaching Guy Fawkes Night, one tradition in many ways dying out is of boys and girls making a replica of Guy to which we hawk around our local streets shouting "Penny for the Guy" at any adults.
We did for two reason, one we loved making something connected with our history and the other was it helped eek out our pocket money as we approached christmas.
We always had a bonfire with fireworks at school where we were handed out  sparklers to wave making shapes and words.

More kitty madness

Well the inner girl in me cannot get enough of Hello Kitty being so cute in that overtly girlie girl way and anyway it's really in control of me!























The above is my new HK flight bag that happens to be ideal for butting my purse and sandwiches in for work.



And this is the new Tote bag ideal for putting magazines and that in while I'm in town.

Just one more day to both Halloween AND Hello Kitty's birthday so enjoy yourselves and remember as Kitty would say "Make cupcakes not war".
I always loved the opportunities for dress ups Halloween gave and that was no surprise was it.

Play clothes II

There's a bit of me that is sandwiched between middle and little, sometimes being little and at other times influenced by but middle and it's things like ra-ra skirts especially in cotton although to wear these at this time of year you'd be look at being indoors with the central heating on.
Play clothes really is an area I feel a need actively consider wearing and to explore as a part of my physical expression of being junior me.
Something like these T shirt and skirt sets but in grown up sizes would probably would it cos they need to be connected to child-like fun .

Regressive replacements II

Why not tackle my motivation and exercise needs too

Buy me a skipping rope to help my co-ordination and keep my weight down

Making me skip in my new uniform to really make me a girl out of me

Equally mark out an area for me to play Hopscotch, in that uniform as your girl

And for indoors to keep me busy, get me a Yo-Yo to.

Wrapping up time!

It's started to get colder now and as I like to go out a good deal walking, a form of exercise that not only keeps my weight under control but also keeps me mentally alert thoughts drifted toward new extremity covering garments for the season. The colours are so girlish they're irresistible.
This caught my fancy at Monsoon. Made by Accessorize, it's a thick woollen hat and glove set entitled "Bright Heart & Check chunky Chullo" with the hat being £18 and the matching gloves for £12.

Chore for Jo?, oh come on!

 Much of this it has to be said isn't what I'm doing now and never did as an actual child at all being pretty much waited on by parental choice and that says a lot about where all this business between me getting alongside other people and their expectations is going wrong.
I have opt outs and cards to play to put a stop to chores but it's doing me no good.
That's why I think I could use some real parenting.

A new dawn

 At high school we did Scottish Country dancing but never highland dancing as pictured  above  where the dancer is in Aboyne dress.
The more I have thought about it, the more I have come to the conclusion that I wish to come to a better understanding of how my 'Little Girl' side works, how I can engage with it constructively while handling my adult responsibilities that arise from the chronological side of my so-called age.I believe the only way I may achieve this is through dialog with like minded people not that will say 'you do this, this and this' but more I'lll be able to take in synthesize and construct a way that will work for me.

More regressive replacements

Remove my adult sleeping attire and replace by something really cute so I'm your little girl sleeping in her childrens bed at a early hour of your very own choosing.

The whole idea is to reset sleeping to something much more in tune with my little needs and out of an adult context.

On family life

Apart from so wanting the girls school tunics I just wanted to be feel a part of proper loving family who cared for each other as a unit rather than the mess and disturbances I had with mine as a child.
Something really met my needs.

Regressive replacements

And while your at it, why not replace some interests and hobbies for something more suitable?

Like giving me dolls so rather than reading glossy fashion magazines, I play with dollies, dressing them?
Or card games for the child I'm regressing to?

 

So I play snap  instead with you.

And a plushie to carry with me too?

Hey teacher

I always had a defiant streak in me, not usually a loud one but one that certainly was there toward  anyone that would deny me what I wanted or free expression of what I felt, having very strong emotions running through me.
That urge to lash out was and is in me even now even if I may use words rather than physical objects to lob in your general direction and yest sometimes months one when I find out what it was really about I have pangs of regret for just lashing out rather than checking the facts first.

Soul Eaters

Maka Alburn Meister from Soul Eaters.

Eventually I got around to finishing off the Soul Eater series.
A recent arrival here, I have just finished watching all 13 episodes on this two dvd anime set.
Produced by studio Bones who've given us Fullmetal Alchemist and Cowboy Be-Bop this is an innovative series that keeps you glued to the seat of your pants.
 Adapted from Atsushi Okubo's Soul Eater manga, the series is set in Death City where the Death Weapons Meisters Academy (DWMA) an institution where spiritually charged students change into weapons or have the ability to wield them.
The lessons are a bit unusual in that students have to hunt down Kishin (demons that consume the souls of innocent living in order to increase their own powers) however if a student wear to defeat 99 kishin and eat their souls AND then eat the soul of an evil Witch for their 100th meal, they evolve into a Death Scythe an extremely powerful form used by Lord Death himself.
The main characters Maka and Soul are an odd couple but they kind of get along which just as well for a Meister and her weapon!
I enjoyed watching the this part of the series as we were slowly introduced to all the characters and their personalities.
Manga issued it over here as a two dvd set in a single regular case which apart from taking up less space than stand alone discs is actually cheaper (Amazon, HMV and Play were doing it for 14.99 shipped) and should encourage folk to keep with properly licensed discs.
I'd give this set 8/10.

Background: Set in the Shinigami technical school for weapon meisters, the series revolves around 3 groups of each a weapon meister and a human weapon. Trying to make the latter a "Death Scythe" and thus fit for use by the Shinigami, they must collect the souls of 99 evil humans and 1 witch. Soul Eater is an anime that centres around meisters and their weapons and their mission to collect 99 evil souls and 1 witch soul. Upon doing that the meister's weapons will become a Deathscythe, which is the highest title for a weapon. Maka, Soul Eater, Black Star, Tsubaki, Death the Kid, and Patty and Liz Thompson are the characters Soul Eater revolves around. Besides taking the time to gather souls these students of Shibusen defend Death City from some of the most powerful of creatures while still attending school and trying to become stronger. 
*Originally written July 1st 2010
I bought volumes 2 and three upon day of issue.

 Volume four sees the DWMA forced into making a deal via Medusa offering Lord Death vital information about the Kishin in exchange for her safety. After she leaves, the increasingly crazed Stein wanders out after her with the manipulative witch Medusa (who is Crona's evil mother) for the location of the Kishin an Arachne's base of operations, Baba Yaga Castle. Meanwhile Doctor Stein loses himself to madness and Crona decides to take on some responsibility.

Soon everyone is preparing for their own missions: Black Star, Tsubaki, Soul Eater and Maka are going to join Death's armies, and attack Arachne and the Kishin; Death the Kid heads for a devastated city to retrieve the last magical item; and Crona and Marie set out to rescue Stein from Medusa. Both Kid and Maka are having doubts about whether they're doing the right thing, especially since Maka is worried about what will happen when Crona encounters his evil mother.

As we watch we see the main main characters maturing in their own ways. Maka and Death the Kid begin to doubt everything they've ever been taught, including their trust in Lord Death. Soul has to deal with his inner imp once and for all, and Crona desperately tries to atone for his sins against his friends as well as growing more confident in his body. Even Black Star is confronted by a rather sinister anecdote about his late father (who had a very similar personality), but refuses to give up.
It's been a inviting series that nevers lets up to the final end.

Play clothes

Clothes are worn for all occasions and here's one that' so me, clothes to wear when playing.

 T shirts are dead easy to put on and look after coming in suitably cute designs like this one.

There is nothing wrong at all in wearing shorts as a girl and as a girl I have every perfect right to wear them as part of being that girl  and as big part of my past childhood was in shorts there's no reason not to take it forward.
Shorts with no zip or button fly  being held at what would of been the hem in very girl like manner are entirely appropriate for me. Having a boy past doesn't mean I have to be in skirts and dresses 24/7.

EGL Edition

A couple of Elegant Gothic Lolita items I quite like:
From Candy Fruit, this traditional Maids Outfit.

























Metamorphose: This is available in a number of different colours, this one being the Rose Pink Gardening Teddy Dress.

An other option for Jo

Looking at the previous post there is another form of presentation I could be put in that would fit in too.
Remember how it was I told you January last about  my past, how it was I had to go school wearing grey shorts even though I really was a girl on the inside?
Well, you could still do that but put me in girls school shorts instead like these  which would be accepted in good number of Junior schools.

These are adjustable at the waist band for a good fit and unlike the shorts I had to wear last  time  don't have a fly zip not that that ever counted for much with me back then anyway!

The whole thing would look like this, white blouse, red and white tie grey tights (although you could wear just below the knee socks with them either grey or white) and proper T-Bar shoes which I can fasten dead easy.
I'd still be a girl, looking pretty girlish and you could still spank me just like I was the last time I was in school shorts just the same just this time you see me as that girl.
'kay?

Whee!

This was my life, a life I loved as much as disliked the difficulties and prejudice of I endured in my youth.
 To me the park was this magical place, a place that had things but you added to that from what was within you, your imagination, and boy did I have an imagination!
 We created and played games there carefully observing the rules and for the most part at least always looked out in case someone felt uncomfortable in the game we were playing.
If I was feeling a bit low, then another would swing me having talked me on to getting on that swing and it wasn't too long before my face was dressed with a smile as I just loved that rocking back and forth motion. To be honest I'd just love to be swung right now if the truth be known.
There was a slide probably made from aluminum or steel that you had to climb several steps to place yourself with your bottom on the edge and start that gushing great sliding motion down to the very end. Whee! I just loved it!!!

The needs of Jo

Looking at my other needs, not those that seem to predominate much of this particular blog rather than the other but to whom in reality they really are connected at the core like bothy my big and little sides there are few that I wish to talk about.

 One is that although I like books I struggle with my reading which is very much at a level at or below a ten year olds when it comes to making sense of the twists and turns of plots in fiction or the progression of ideas in more factual books like text or workbooks which means much of what is written for adult readers is no use to me and even some 12 plus teen fiction is too.
What I'd like is someone with more the manner and authority of  a teacher to try to help me get more from reading, understanding more of what I can read and able to share it with people as the child that in so many ways I remain.


lll

Keep fit - Past and present

As a child like most we had PE (Physical Exercise) which was never the most popular thing on the subject list. Most of time it would involve things such as doing press ups and generally strengthening our muscles and improving the range of movements we could do using our joints

Sometimes I just miss that PE master or Miss pushing me on!

This said I do exercise a bit even now having back problems and issues with posture generally to help my condition

Getting back into the swing of outdoor exercise such as walking and bit of basic mat PE style exercise indoors like press ups to keep my muscles working something like that with my disabilities it's very good idea to do - and we have rain for much of the week!

So guess what it does? yes, buckets down. Grrr!

Never mind I have a new pair of exercise shorts to wear ready for when the downpours and strong winds stop.

Lessons

The whole notion of school based age play with me role playing a Juniorish school girl is a big part of me and something having oscillated over isn't something I'd deny anymore although outside of a few things around uniform, I haven't done much with it.
Although this is a Victorian classroom, chunks of this are similar to my first school such as the chalkboard, globe abacus and cane which we were most familiar with.
The sort of scene, girl breaches school rule like not doing homework, gets punished and has to sit at the desk in detention doing lines is part of that although the actual business of doing some real study  age-play age studying is the other equal part.
I wouldn't be interested in an age-play school role play that was 75% corporal punishment and the rest just socializing as for one thing it lacks authenticity for me and secondly I do actual want to learn things.

If only...

Minimalism it has to be said was not really something I was brought up with with everything we ever owned, shoe-horned in, a skill that no doubt aided my ability to really pack a suitcase right to the brim with stuff. Indeed it was something of a standing joke between Dad and Guesthouse owners upon arrival  whenever we went on vacations that we had  more stuff for four days away than many had for ten or more overseas.

Although I never had a word for it even in those days of film cameras, I used to attempt to take pictures of myself, trying on various outfits in the room sometimes involving putting the camera on a tripod looking toward a wall or chair or just hnad holding it in front of the wardrobe mirror.

Sometimes I wish back then we'd of had a smartphone so could of taken pictures like this easily or gotten Mom to taken them for me.

That's cos I like to document my life in time.

The Adventurous Four

I don't know about you but adventure stories have always had an appeal and two wonderful books in the series The Adventurous Four set off the Scottish West coast where four children with the oldest Andy aged 14 who's acquired already a good knowledge of the sea, islands and sealife is  helping his Dad,  encounter Nazi's thieves and gunrunners.
The series is very much set in Wartime arguably more so than any other of Enid Blyton's work and sees them taken prisoner by the Nazi's resolving to show them what Scots are made of.

These are my copies in the Deans Rewards series from 1973 where as with a few other series such as the Famous Five, the skirts and shorts worn by the children in the original  covers are replaced with Jeans although we all know children during the War never had Jeans!